The One With The Red Sweater

Written by: Dana Klein Borkow
Directed by: David Schwimmer
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

[Scene: The Hotel Lobby, Rachel and Phoebe are at the front desk checking out.]
Rachel: Listen y’know what sir? For the last time, I don’t care what the computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did not watch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little!
Escuche, por última vez, no me interesa lo que diga la computadora.
No tomamos una bolsa de nueces de Meshuggah.
Y no vimos "Dr. Do- Me- A- Little".

Joey: (entering) Hey!

Phoebe: Oh! Joey uh, were you in our room last night?
¿Estuviste en nuestro cuarto anoche?

Joey: No. (Phoebe grabs the receipt and shows it to Joey who gets mad.) I was told the name of the movie would not appear on the bill!
(Chandler and Monica enter.)
No.
¡Me dijeron que el nombre de la película no aparecería en la cuenta!

Chandler: (to the front desk clerk) Hi! We’re checking out of the bridal suite.
Saliendo de la suite matrimonial.

Monica: (depressed) That’s right. I’m no longer a bride. I’ll never be a bride again. Now, I’m just someone’s wife!
Sí, ya no soy más una novia.
Nunca volveré a serlo.
Ahora sólo soy la esposa de alguien..

Chandler: And I’m the happiest guy in the world! (Monica goes and sits down in a huff.) Oh honey, come on don’t be upset. We still have so much to look forward to!
Y yo soy el hombre más feliz de la tierra.
Tenemos mucho por delante.

Monica: Oh yeah, right. (Rolls her eyes.)
Sí, seguro.

Chandler: We got the honeymoon.
La luna de miel.

Monica: That’s not ‘til Thursday.
No es hasta el Jueves.

Chandler: The wedding pictures?
Fotos del matrimonio.

Monica: They won’t be ready for weeks.
Se demoran semanas.

Chandler: Not the disposable cameras from the tables.
No las de cámaras desechables ...

Monica: That’s true! (Happily) I knew I married you for a reason!
¡Sabía que por algo me casé contigo!

Chandler: I’ll tell you what, I will go get them developed and you can go home.
Las voy a ir a revelar, y puedes irte a casa.

Monica: Okay.
(Joey giggles.)

Chandler: What? What did you take a picture of?
¿A qué le tomaste fotos?

Joey: Nothing! It was something.
Nada, era algo.

Chandler: Okay Ross has the cameras, has he checked out yet?
Ross tiene las cámaras. ¿Ya salió de su habitación?

Rachel: Are you joking? Check out is not ‘til noon and he has a good (checks her watch) eleven minutes left.
¿Estás bromeando?
El horario de salida es a las 12.
Así que le quedan largos 11 minutos.

Chandler: Oh.

Monica: Ross has never checked out of a room a minute before he had to.
¿Y?
Él nunca sale de su habitación un minuto antes del que le corresponde.

Rachel: Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he got so excited it was the best sex we ever had. Until y’know, he screamed out Radisson at the end.
Una vez salimos tarde y se excitó tanto, que el mejor sexo de nuestras vidas.
Hasta que gritó "Radisson" al final.

Chandler: Okay, well I’m gonna get Ross, get the cameras, and get them developed. (Joey laughs again.) 32 Joe. You’re 32! (Exits)
OK, voy a buscar a Ross para que me dé las camaras y revelar las fotos.
32, Joe. ¡Tienes 32!

Front Desk Clerk: (To Monica) Here’s a copy of your bill.
Aquí está su cuenta.

Monica: Oh thanks. (Reading the bill) Champagne, strawberries…Oh my God! I can’t believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night!
Gracias.
Champaña, frambuesas...
¡Oh, Dios! No puedo creer que Chandler haya ordenado porno en nuestra noche de bodas.

Joey: Yeah, that’s sad. Mashuga nut?
Sí, es triste. Una nuez de Meshuggah?

Opening Credits
[Scene: Ross’s Hotel Room, he is letting Chandler in.]

Ross: Hi.

Chandler: Hey. (He sees that Ross is packing all of the hotel toiletries) Soaps? Shampoos? Are you really taking all this stuff?
Jabones, shampoos.
¿Realmente te vas a llevar todo esto?

Ross: Why not? It’s built into the price of the room.
¿Porqué no? Está incluido en el precio.

Chandler: Yeah but you don’t need—(Picks up something)—What is this?
Sí, pero no necesitas ...
¿Qué es esto?

Ross: Thread!
¡Hilo!

Chandler: Score! Where are the disposable cameras?
¡Qué bien!
¿Donde están las cámaras desechables?

Ross: What disposable cameras?
¿Qué cámaras?

Chandler: The cameras? Remember last night I told you to take them?
Anoche te pedí que las tomaras.

Ross: No you didn’t.
No, no lo hiciste.

Chandler: Yes! Remember? Right before we cut the cake, I went up to you and I said…
Sí, antes de cortar la torta, dije...

Ross: Oh-oh yeah, you-you came up to me and asked if I could do you a favor, and my Uncle Murray came up to you and handed you a check. And then you said, "Why do they call it a check? Why not a Yugoslavian?" (Chandler laughs.) Yeah, then you did that.
Sí, me pediste un favor. Luego, mi tío Murray te chequeó.
Luego dijiste: "¿Porqué se llama 'chequeo'?
¿Porqué no 'Yugoslavieo'?
Sí, y luego hiciste eso.

Chandler: So you don’t have the cameras?!
¿Así que no tienes las cámaras?

Ross: No. Sorry man.
No, lo siento.

Chandler: So? What? What? They’re gone! Monica’s gonna freak!
¿No están? ¡Monica me va a matar!

Ross: Well, I’m sure they’re still somewhere here in the hotel. I’ll-I’ll help you look for them.
Están por aquí, te ayudaré a buscar.

Chandler: Great.
Bien.

Ross: In-in three minutes.
En tres minutos.

(Chandler goes into the bathroom, closes the door, and then opens it again right away. Ross looks up and hands him the toilet paper Ross already packed.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe is entering to see Monica sitting in front of a mound of wedding gifts.]

Phoebe: Hey!

Monica: Hey!

Phoebe: Are you gonna open the presents without Chandler?
¿Vas a abrir los regalos sin Chandler?

Monica: No! (Pause) But, they’re callin’ out to me! I mean this little guy (Holds up a small one) even crawled up into my lap. Oh come on, Chandler wouldn’t mind if I opened just one present! What do you think it is?
Me estábn llamando. Este tipo incluso me gritó en el oído.
No le molestaría que abriera uno. ¿Qué crees que es?

Phoebe: A little mirror that when you look into it you see yourself as an old woman.
(Monica opens it anyways.)
Un espejo al cual miras, y te ves como una mujer vieja.

Monica: A tiny salt shaker!!!
¡Un salerito!

Phoebe: Ohhh! My God! For tiny salt!
¡Oh, Dios, para sal pequeña!

Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Well that was fun.
¡Oh, wow! OK, fue divertido.

Phoebe: Oh yeah.

Monica: Good. Okay, I’m just gonna wait for Chandler to open the rest of them.
OK, esperaré a Chandler para abrir el resto.

Phoebe: Okay.

Monica: Whew. Although y’know, this is part of a salt and pepper set. I mean… I guess y’know it may just count as a half a present. What do you think?
Aunque, sabes, esto es parte de un set de sal y pimienta.
Es sólo la mitad de un regalo. ¿Qué crees?

Phoebe: Well I guess it’s okay to open one more if it’s part of a set. Y’know, it’s probably this one. (Grabs another small one.)
Está bien abrir uno más si es un set. Probablemente sea este.

Monica: Or this one! (She grabs and starts to open the biggest present.)
¡O este otro!

Rachel: (entering) Hi.

Monica: Hey, how are you feelin’? Any morning sickness?
Hola, ¿cómo te sientes? ¿Algún problema?

Rachel: Shh-shh-shh! The guys don’t know yet do they?
Los chicos no lo saben aún, ¿cierto?

Monica: No! Joey and Ross don’t know anything and Chandler still thinks that Phoebe’s pregnant.
No. Chandler cree que Phoebe está
embarazada.

Phoebe: Yeah that’s right Chandler does still think I’m pregnant. He hasn’t asked me how I’m feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
Exacto. Chandler todavía piensa que estoy embarazada.
No me ha preguntado cómo me siento,
no me ha ofrecido cargas mis bolsas ...
Me siento mal por la mujer que termine estando con él.
Después de tí, por supuesto.

Rachel: Don’t worry I promise that you will only have to be pregnant for a few more hours, ‘cause I’m going to tell the father today.
Sólo estarás embarazada por unas horas.
Hoy le diré al padre.

Phoebe: Ooh, is it someone in this building? Is it that tall guy from the first floor?
¿Alguien de este edificio?
¿Es el tipo alto del primer piso?

Rachel: Ew! No!
¡No!

Phoebe: What?! I think he’s cute.
¿Qué? Es bonito.

Rachel: Well then you have his baby.
Entonces tú ten su bebé.

Phoebe: Believe me I’m trying.
Créeme, estoy tratando.

Monica: Wow. Y’know it is so weird. I mean, you’re gonna tell this guy today and he has no idea what’s gonna happen.
Es extraño. Le vas a decir a este tipo hoy, pero no tiene idea.

Phoebe: Yeah. You’re just gonna knock on his door and change his life forever. You’re like Ed McMahon except without the big check, or the raw sexual magnetism.
Sólo tocarás a su puesta y cambiarás su vida para siempre.
Eres como Ed McMahon, sólo que sin dinero.
O el salvaje magnetismo sexual.

Rachel: Yeah. Uh-huh, I guess it is pretty big news.
Sí, creo que son noticias bastante grandes.

Phoebe: Pretty big? It’s huge! God, this guy doesn’t have a clue! He’s just walking down the street thinking, ‘I had sex with Rachel Green. I rock!’ then bam! He’s a father and everything’s different.
¿Bastante grandes? ¡Enormes!
Dios, este tipo está caminando y piensa:
"Tuve sexo con Rachel Green. ¡Soy cool!"
Luego, ¡bam! Es padre, todo es diferente.

Rachel: Well it’s only different if he wants it to be. I mean, I’m not gonna ask him for anything.
Sólo si quiere serlo. No le pediré nada.

Phoebe: Okay. Then he still has this huge decision to make. Now he’s walking around thinking, ‘Do I want to be a dad?’ and then bam!
Dios, este tipo ahora está caminando y piensa:
"¿Quiero ser padre?" Luego, ¡bam!

Monica: What was that bam?
¿Qué es el "bam"?

Phoebe: I don’t. He got…he-he-he-he’s hit by a bus.
No sé ... lo choca un bus.

Joey: (entering) Hey!

Rachel: Hey Joey, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you that she was pregnant?
Joey, ¿que harías si alguien con quien te has acostado te dice que está embarazada?

Joey: (warily) Who called here? Did she sound blond? Huh? Did-did-did she have an accent? I gotta make a call! (Starts to leave) I shoulda never walked into that Sunglass Hut!
¿Quién llamó?
¿Sonaba como rubia? ¿Algún acento especial? Debo hacer una llamada.
¡Nunca debí haber caminado hacia ese Sunglass Hut!

Rachel: Oh Joey! Joey! No, it’s not you! You didn’t get anybody pregnant!
¡No eres tú! No has dejado embarazada a nadie.

Joey: Oh. Why would you scare me like that? What the hell is going on? (Pause.) Is somebody pregnant?
¿Porqué me asustaron así? ¿Qué diablos sucede?
¿Alguien está embarazada?

Phoebe: Oh yeah. That’s me.
¡Oh sí! Yo.

Joey: Oh my God Pheebs! You’re gonna have a baby?
¡Oh, Dios, Pheebs! ¿Vas a tener un bebé?

Phoebe: Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, I’m gonna have a baby! (Joey and Phoebe hug.)
Sí. Oh Dios, ¡voy a tener un bebé!

Joey: Whoa, wait a minute. Who’s the father?
Espera, ¿quién es el padre?

Phoebe: You don’t know him. It’s not important. He wants nothing to do with me or the baby. (She sits down like she’s pregnant.)
No lo conoces, no importa.
No quiere saber nada conmigo o con el bebé.

Joey: Well who is this guy?! Huh? Who is he? ‘Cause I will track him down and kick his ass!
¿Quién es ese tipo? ¡Porque lo agarraré y le patearé el trasero!

Phoebe: David Lynn.
David Linn.

Joey: David Lynn! David Lynn! David Lynn!! (Exits)
¡David Linn!

Monica: Who’s David Lynn?
¿Quién es David Linn?

Phoebe: Oh some guy from my gym. A little annoying.
Un tipo del gimnasio, un poco desagradable.

[Scene: The Banquet Room, Chandler is under one of the tables as Ross enters.]

Ross: Chandler?
¿Chandler?

Chandler: Hey! Did you find the cameras?
¿Encontraste las cámaras?

Ross: No. Did you?
No. ¿Y tú?

Chandler: Yes! And that’s why I’m under the table. Celebrating.
Sí, por eso estoy abajo de la mesa. Celebrando.


Ross: Well I checked in the uh, lost and found, I talked to the manager, no-one’s turned them.
Busqué en los "Perdidos y Encontrados"
Nadie las tomó.

Chandler: Well this is great. Y’know, those cameras were the only thing that was gonna cheer Monica up today, she’s really depressed.
Grandioso. Esas cámaras eran lo único que animaría a Monica.

Ross: Now you guys just got married, why is she so depressed?
Recién te casaste. ¿Porqué está deprimida?

Chandler: All my energy is going into not asking that question. I can’t believe I screwed this up!
No contestaré esa pregunta. ¡No puedo creer que lo eché a perder!

Ross: I’m sorry man. (Formally dressed people start to enter.) Here’s a thought. This is the same ballroom. There’s a band. There’s gonna be plenty of dressed up people.
Lo siento. Tengo una idea. Es el mismo salón.
Hay una banda. Habrá gente bien vestida.

Chandler: Are you suggesting we dance our troubles away?
¿Estás sugiriendo que hagamos bailar a nuestros problemas?

Ross: No-no-no, I’m saying we-we buy more of this (disposable cameras) at the gift shop, throw our tuxes back on, and take a few pictures. All we have to do is make sure not to get anybody else’s faces.
No, compramos más de esas, nos ponemos los smokings y nos tomamos fotos.
Debemos asegurarnos de que no aparezcan las caras de la gente.

Chandler: Are you serious?
¿Hablas en serio?

Ross: I’m just thinking about your new bride at home. Okay? Do-do you really want to start your life together by letting her down?
Estoy pensando sobre tu novia. ¿Realmente quieres decepcionarla?

Chandler: Marriage advice? Really?!
¿Consejos matrimoniales? ¿De verdad?

Ross: I’m telling you, this looks exactly like your wedding! Aren’t these the same flowers?
Se parece mucho a tu boda. ¿Las mismas flores?

Chandler: I don’t know, Monica picked out the flowers.
No sé. Monica las tomó.

Ross: What about the chairs?
¿Las sillas?

Chandler: She picked those out too.
Esas también.

Ross: How about the place settings?
¿Los lugares para sentarse?

Chandler: That was her.
Ella.

Ross: What did you do?
¿Qué haces?

Chandler: I was in charge of the cameras! Gift shop?
Cuido las cámaras. ¿Tienda de regalos?

Ross: Hmm. (They head off to the gift shop.)

[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting on the couch as Phoebe enters.]

Phoebe: Hey! Ooh, did you do it yet?
¿Ya lo hiciste?

Rachel: Not yet.
Aún no.

Phoebe: Oh, well what are you doing here? Are you about to do it? (Gasps) Is it Gunther?
¿Entonces qué haces aquí? ¿Lo harás o no?
¿Ese no es Gunther?

Rachel: No! Phoebe, it’s not Gunther.
¡No es Gunther!

Phoebe: Thank God, ‘cause that hair on a baby…
Gracias a Dios. ¿Ese pelo en un bebé?

Rachel: Phoebe the father is not here okay? I haven’t told him yet and I don’t think I can tell him at all now!
El padre no está aquí. No le he dicho, y no creo que pueda ahora.

Phoebe: Why not?
¿Porqué no?

Rachel: I don’t know, let me think. I was walking down the street thinking, ‘I’m gonna tell the father today’ and then bam!
Estaba caminando y pensando: "Le diré al padre". Y luego, ¡bam!

Phoebe: Bus?
¿Bus?

Rachel: No, you! Phoebe you freaked me out. You kept saying how huge this all is!
¡No, tú! Me asustaste. Siempre dices que es algo enorme.

Phoebe: Well-well but it is huge.
Pero es enorme.

Rachel: I know, but I was just thinking about how huge this is for me. I didn’t even go to how huge this was going to be for the father.
Lo sé.
Pero pensaba cuán enorme es para mí.
No pensé en el padre.

Phoebe: You’re thinking about this way too much. Just tell him and get it over with. It’s like, it’s like ripping off this Band-Aid. (On her arm) Quick and painless, watch. (Rips it off.) Oh mother of…See?
Estás pensando mucho. Dile y termina con esto.
Es como sacarte este parche curita, rápido y sin dolor.
¡Oh, la pu....! ¿Ves?

[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Obsessive Monica has now opened more of the wedding gifts.]

Joey: (entering) Ooh-ooh-ooh! Are we opening presents?
¿Estás abriendo regalos?

Monica: No! No! I shouldn’t have even opened these! I mean I—Joey I am out of control!! Joey, you have to do me a favor. No matter what I say, no matter what I do, please do not let me open another present! Okay?
No. No los abriría.
Joey, ¡estoy fuera de control! Tienes que hacerme un favor.
No importa lo que sucesa, no me dejes abrir otro regalo.

Joey: Okay.

Monica: Give me one more.
Dame uno más.

Joey: Okay. (Hands her one.)

Phoebe: (entering) Hey.

Joey: Oh good, uh you’re here. Uh Pheebs? Listen uh sit down. I-I got something I want to say.
Bien, estás aquí. ¿Pheebs? Escucha.
Siéntate, quiero que sepas algo.

Phoebe: All right. (She sits down like she’s pregnant again.)

Joey: Umm, now uh… It’s a scary world out there, especially for a single mom. Y’know, now I always thought you and I had a special bond so… (He goes to one knee and pulls out a ring.) Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Hay un temible mundo allá afuera, especialmente para una madre soltera.
Siempre sentí que tú y yo tenemos un lazo especial..
Así que, Phoebe Buffay, ¿te casarías conmigo?

Monica: Oh my God! Joey!
Oh, ¡Dios mío!

Phoebe: Hell yeah! I’ll marry you! (She grabs the ring and puts it on.)
Oh, sí, me casaré contigo.

Monica: You can’t marry him!
¡No puedes casarte con él!

Phoebe: Hey lady, your day’s over! It’s my turn!
Tu día terminó, es mi turno.

Monica: Phoebe!

Joey: Why?! Why can’t she marry me?!
¿Porqué ella no puede casarse conmigo?

Phoebe: I can and I will! (Kisses him.)
Puedo y lo haré.

Monica: She’s not pregnant. It’s Rachel. Rachel’s the one who’s pregnant.
Ella no está embarazada. Rachel lo está.

Joey: Oh my God.

Phoebe: Hey!

Monica: Phoebe I think he would notice if you didn’t have a baby in nine months!
Oh, ¡Dios mío!
¡Él notaría cuando no tengas un bebé!

Phoebe: It’s Joey! (Joey turns and looks at her and she mouths ‘I love you’ to him.)
¡Es Joey!

Joey: (smiles then stops) Now I can’t believe it! What? Rachel’s pregnant? (The girls nod yes.) Who’s the father?
¡No puedo creerlo! ¡Rachel embarazada!
¿Quién es el padre?


Phoebe: We don’t know.
145
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:06,440
No sabemos.

Joey: Ohh… I wonder if that dude.
Me imagino si es este tipo.

Monica: There’s a dude?
¿Hay un tipo?

Joey: Yeah.

Phoebe: Who? Who is it?
¿Quién es?

Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didn’t see who it was but… (He walks out and closes the door.)
Hace un mes pasó la noche con un tipo. No vi quien era, pero ...

Phoebe: Was that story over?
(They follow him and meet him in the hall coming out of his apartment carrying a sweater.)
¿Esa historia terminó?

Joey: The guy left this.
El tipo se fue.

Phoebe: (gasps) Oh my God! I know who the father is… (She walks into Monica and Chandler’s.)
Oh, ¡Dios! Sé quién es el padre.

Monica: People have got to finish their stories!
La gente debe terminar sus historias.

Commercial Break
[Scene: The Banquet Room, Ross and Chandler are in their tuxes and have started to fake the pictures.]
Chandler: (to another couple) Uh, excuse me? Could you take a picture of us?
¿Puede tomarnos una foto?

Woman At The Wedding: Oh! Of course. (Ross and Chandler pose and she takes the picture.)
Por supuesto.

Man At The Wedding: Uh, would you take one of us?
¿Puede tomarnos una a nosotros?

Chandler: Uhh… Yeah sure. (Holds the camera up to his face.) Click!
Sí, seguro. Click.

Woman At The Wedding: It didn’t click.
No sonó.

Ross: I heard it. I heard it.
Yo la escuché.

Man At The Wedding: But there was no flash.
Salió sin flash.

Woman At The Wedding: Why won’t you take our picture?
¿No tomarás nuestra foto?

Chandler: Oh yeah. I’ll take, I’ll take your picture. (He takes the picture with his finger over the lens.)
Sí, tomaré su foto.

Man At The Wedding: Uh, your finger was covering the lens.
Tu dedo tapaba el lente.

Chandler: Who are you? Ansel Adams?! Get outta here!
¿Quién eres, Ansel Adams? ¡Lárgate!

[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are about to go inside.]

Phoebe: Look, I feel really bad about how I freaked you out before, so I called the father and asked him to meet you here so you can tell him. Go!
Mira, me siento muy mal por haberte asustado antes...
...así que le dije al padre que viniera para acá.

Rachel: What? Hey wait a minute! Phoebe, how do you even know who the father is?
¿Qué? Espera un segundo. ¿Cómo sabes quién es?

Phoebe: I may play the fool at times, but I’m a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that won’t quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.
Puedo hacerme la tonta a veces ...... pero soy más que una bella rubia con un trasero más que decente.
Creo que esto pertenece al padre.

Rachel: Oh God… Oh, he’s in there right now?
Oh, Dios. ¿Está adentro ahora?

Phoebe: Uh-huh. Now you can turn around or you can go in there and rip the Band-Aid off. What to you want to do?
Puedes darte la vuelta, o entrar y sacarte el parche curita.

Rachel: Uh, let’s rip!
Lo sacaré.

Phoebe: Really? Are you sure?
¿Estás segura?

Rachel: Oh Phoebe!
¡Phoebe!

Phoebe: Okay, sorry. Yeah. (They go inside to confront the father.)
Lo siento.

Tag: Hey Rach.
Hey, Rach.

[Scene: The Banquet Room, Ross is taking a picture of a plant, Chandler a fork. The band stops.]

Chandler: Why don’t you go up on stage. I’ll get a picture of you doing the speech.
Sube al escenario. Te sacaré una foto haciendo el discurso.

Ross: Okay. Okay!
(He goes up on stage, mimes like he's giving the speech, and Chandler takes his picture. However, before he gets down everyone starts clinking their glasses for a real speech.)

Ross: Will the owner of a 1995 Buick LeSabre please see the front desk? Your car is about to be towed.
¿Podría el dueño de un LeSabre de 1995 acercarse al escenario?
Su auto está a punto de ser remolcado.

Anxious Wedding Guest: (rushing up) That’s my car!
¡Ese es mi auto!

Ross: A ’95 LeSabre?!
¿Un Lesabre del '95?

Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes!
Sí.

Ross: A green LeSabre?
¿Un LeSabre verde?

Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes!
¡Sí!

Ross: I’m sorry, I meant a blue LeSabre.
Lo siento, quise decir azul.

Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes! Green-blue!
¡Sí, verde-azul!

Ross: Well go! Go move it! (He runs off.)
Bueno, ¡vaya y muévalo!

Chandler: Okay, you ready for the last picture?
¿Listo para la última foto?

Ross: Yeah.

Chandler: Get ready to run. (Chandler walks over to the new bride.) Congratulations on your wedding. (He grabs her, kisses her, Ross takes the picture, and they both run out.)
Prepárate para correr.

[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier.]

Tag: So, what’s this about?
¿De qué se trata esto?

Phoebe: Rachel has something that she wants to tell you and umm, I believe that this is your red sweater.
Rachel tiene algo que decirte.
Y creo que este es tu suéter rojo.

Tag: No. (Unzips his coat.) This is my red sweater.
No, este es mi suéter rojo.

Phoebe: Oh no. Could I get anyone a coffee or…poison? No? Just for me? Okay. (Walks away.)
Oh, no.
¿Puedo invitar a alguno a un café? ¿O veneno? ¿No?
¿Sólo para mí? OK.

Tag: What’s going on Rach?
¿Qué sucede?

Rachel: Nothing! Phoebe kinda made a mistake. But y’know you do wear that sweater a lot, are you involved in some kind of dare?
Nada. Phoebe cometió una especie de error.
Pero tú usas mucho ese suéter. ¿Es una especie de manda?

Tag: Y’know, I’m actually glad Phoebe called. (He pulls out a stool and Rachel sits down.) I know we broke up because you thought I wasn’t mature enough, but I’ve really grown up and think we should get back together.
Realmente me sentí contento cuando Phoebe llamó.
Era inmaduro, pero he crecido. Pienso que deberíamos volver.

Rachel: Oh, it’s just not the right time.
No es el momento.

Tag: It is the right time. (Takes her hand.)
194
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:43,840
Sí lo es.

Rachel: Okay.

Tag: I’m ready for more.
Estoy listo para más.

Rachel: Tag…

Tag: Come on Rach, let’s give it another try.
Intentémoslo de nuevo.

Rachel: I’m having a baby.
Voy a tener un bebé.

Tag: Oh. (He drops her hand.)
(Pause)

Rachel: You can go.
Puedes irte.

Tag: Thank you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
Gracias.


[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Obsessive Monica has finished opening all the presents. She’s ashamed of this, at least, because as someone enters…]

Monica: (throwing up the last present) I don’t know how any of these got opened?!
¡No sé cómo todos estos venían abiertos!

Joey: (entering) You opened them all?
¿Los abriste todos?

Monica: I know! I know! I am a terrible person! I mean, Chandler is never going to trust me with anything ever again!
Lo sé, soy una persona terrible.
Chandler nunca volverá a confiar en mí.

Joey: Oh hey! You got my parent’s gift! (Holds it up.)
Tienes el regalo de mis padres.

Monica: Yeah. What is that?
¿Qué es?

Joey: Well, I don’t know. I think it does something to salami.
(Phoebe and Rachel enter.)
Creo que es algo con salame.

Monica: Hey! How’d it go?
¿Qué tal estuvo?

Joey: Yeah. What-what did Tag say?
¿Qué dijo Tag?

Rachel: Tag is not the father! And Joey knows now?
Tag no es el padre. ¿Y ahora Joey sabe?

Joey: I do Rach. I do, and I so happy for you. (They hug.)
Lo sé, y estoy feliz por tí.

Rachel: Oh wow, you didn’t even try to unhook my bra!
Wow, ni siquiera trataste de desabrochar mi sostén.

Monica: So are you ever gonna tell whoever it is?
¿Alguna vez dirás quién es?

Rachel: No, I will. I’m just not up for it tonight.
Lo haré, pero no hoy.

Joey: Hey Rach listen, no matter what this guy says I want you to know you’re not gonna be alone in this.
No importa qué diga él, nunca estarás sola.

Rachel: I’m not?
¿No lo estaré?

Joey: Listen I uh… (He takes her hand.) It’s a scary world out there especially if you’re a single mom. Y’know, I always felt like you and I have this-this special bond. Y’know? So, (gets down on one knee again) Rachel Green will you marry me?
No. Escucha.
Hay un temible mundo allá afuera, especialmente para una madre soltera.
Siempre sentí que tú y yo tenemos un lazo especial.
Rachel, ¿te casarías conmigo?

Rachel: What?
¿Qué?

Monica: What?!

Phoebe: What?!!

Joey: Pheebs, give me the ring back!
Pheebs, devuélveme el anillo.

Phoebe: No!!
¡No!

Rachel: No! Joey, oh you’re so sweet. You’re so-so sweet, honey. But I’m not, I’m not looking for a husband.
Joey, querido, eres tan dulce, pero no estoy buscando un marido.

Joey: (heartbroken) I understand.
Lo entiendo.

Rachel: Now, if you will excuse me I am going to go and lie down. (Exits.)
Si me disculpas, me iré y descansaré.

Phoebe: I can’t say that didn’t hurt. But I’ll take you back Joey Tribbiani.
No puedo decir que no dolió.
Pero te la devolveré, Joey Tribbiani.

Joey: Uh yeah. Pheebs, listen about that. I only offered…
Acerca de eso, yo...

Phoebe: Ooh! A Salami Buddy!
Oh, ¡un amigo Salame!

Joey: There you go!
(Chandler and Ross enter with the new pictures.)
¡Ahí tienes!

Chandler: We’re back!
¡Estamos de vuelta!

Monica: Great! We’re hangin’ in the kitchen! (She drags him into the kitchen and turns his back to the living room) Let’s stay in the kitchen!
Genial.
Estábamos en la cocina. Quedémonos en la cocina.

Chandler: It’s picture time.
Hora de ver fotos.

Ross: Now you are going to love these.
Te encantarán estas.

Chandler: (showing her the pictures) Here’s a picture of Ross. (Shows another one.) And that’s me. (Another one.) And that’s me and Ross. (Another one.) Oh-ho, that is a picture of our first kiss as a married couple.
Acá hay una foto de Ross. Y ahí estoy yo.
Y este soy yo y Ross.
Y aquí está nuestro primer beso como matrimonio.

Monica: Wow! That is a great picture!
Esa es una gran foto.

Chandler: Eh?

Monica: Yeah! Oh and interesting because I found the cameras in one of our bags! (Throws them into his chest.)
E interesante, porque encontré las cámaras en uno de tus bolsos.

Ross: Huh, didn’t see that coming.
Nunca me lo imaginé.

Chandler: Okay, so this isn’t a picture of our first, but it is a picture of my first kiss with…with this lady. Which by the look on your face I’m sure you’ll remember. So we don’t need—(Rips the picture)—There’s no need to have this picture. How about I take the real pictures and get them developed right now.
OK, este no es nuestro primer beso...... pero es mi primer beso con esta chica.
De la cual estoy seguro que recuerdas, así que no es necesario ...
Llevaré estas a revelar.

Monica: That would be a good idea.
Buena idea.

Chandler: Okay. (Sees the living room.) You opened all the presents without me?! I thought we were supposed to do that together!
¿Abriste los regalos? Íbamos a hacer esto juntos.

Monica: You kissed another woman!
¿Besaste a otra mujer?

Chandler: Call it even?!
¿Es un empate?

Monica: Okay! (They high-five and he walks out.)
OK.

Ross: Well, I’m gonna go get these (the floral bouquet he walked in with) in some water.
Las pondré en agua.

Phoebe: Wait you stole those from these people’s wedding?
¿Te las robaste del matrimonio?


Ross: No-no, I took them from the hotel lobby. Yeah, they think they can charge me for some dirty movie and a bag of Mashuga nuts, they got another think coming. (Starts to leave.) Hey! My sweater! I’ve been looking for this for like a month!
(He exits leaving a stunned Phoebe and Monica.)
No, del lobby del hotel.
¡¡Ellos creen que pueden molestarme por una película sucia y una bolsa de nueces!!
Hey, ¡mi suéter!
Lo he estado buscando por un mes.

Monica and Phoebe: Oh my God!!
Oh, ¡Dios mío!

Joey: (slow on the uptake) Oh my God!
Oh, ¡Dios mío!

Closing Credits
[Scene: A Street, Ross walks past Tag wearing the same red sweater.]
Ross: Hey! How you doing?
Hey, ¿qué tal?

Tag: Good! Good, long time no see.
Bien. Tanto tiempo sin verte.

Ross: Yeah.

Tag: Like your sweater.
Me gusta tu suéter.

Ross: Oh hey, right back at ya.
El tuyo también.

Tag: Oh, it’s crazy about Rachel huh?
Qué locura lo de Rachel.

Ross: Yeah. She—Well, she’s one crazy lady?
Bueno, ella es una chica loca.

Tag: So whose is it?
¿Así que de quién es?

Ross: (shows Tag his sweater tag) Umm, I don’t some Italian guy. Come on, read your own label. See you later.
No sé, un italiano.
Bueno, lee tu propia etiqueta. Nos vemos.

Tag: Okay.
(They separate.)

Ross: He is so weird.
Él es tan raro.


End

The One After "I Do"

Written by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

[Scene: The Wedding Hall, Monica and Chandler have just said "I do," and the photographer is taking the required pictures. First of Monica, Chandler, Ross and Joey.]

Photographer: Great. (Takes a picture.) Great! Just give me a sec to change film.

Monica: Okay.

Ross: (To Monica) Okay, I know I’m not supposed to know, but I do. And I’m so excited for you!
Ya se que no debería saberlo, pero lo se, y estoy tan entusiasmado.

Joey: What? What’s going on?
Que esta sucediendo?

Ross: Monica’s pregnant!
Monica esta embarazada.

Joey: Oh my God! Is that why you guys had to get married?!
Esa es la razón por la que se tenían que casar?

Monica: Guys! I’m not pregnant.
Muchachos, no estoy embarazada

Joey: Ah. (To Chandler) Slow swimmers? (Chandler looks at him.)
Ahh... nadadores lentos.

Ross: What?! What do you mean? You-you-you’re not pregnant?
Que! No estás embarazada?

Monica: You didn’t tell anybody I was did you?!
Le dijiste a alguien que yo lo estaba?

Ross: No! (Pause) I’ll be right back. (Exits.)
No. Enseguida regreso.

Photographer: Now why don’t we get a shot of just Monica and the bloody soldier.
Ahora un foto de Monica y el soldado ensangrentado.

Monica: (To Joey) Oh, about that. Joey, you have to change before the party.
Te tienes que cambiar antes de la fiesta.

Joey: I can’t! I-I don’t have any other clothes here.
No tengo ninguna otra ropa

Monica: Find some! Please! Anything that doesn’t say I-I died tragically in France. (Joey leaves to find clothes.)
Encuentra algo que no diga, "Yo morí tragicamente en Francia"

Photographer: Well then why don’t we see the bride and the groom and the bridemaids.
Entonces una con los novios y las damas de honor.

Phoebe: Okay. (Phoebe and Rachel join Monica and Chandler on the altar.) Hey Mon, why did you tell the guys you weren’t pregnant?
Porque le dijiste a los muchachos que no estas embarazada?

Monica: Because I’m not.
Porque no lo estoy.

Phoebe: We found your test in the trash, if you’re not pregnant—(She sees Rachel shaking her head)—It’s because I am.
(Flash, the photographer takes a picture of Monica and Chandler’s stunned faces.)
Nosotras encontramos tu test en la basura. Si tu no estás embarazada. . .
Es porque yo si lo estoy...

Chandler: What?! What are you talking about?
Que estas diciendo?

Monica: What are you talking about?

Phoebe: Yes, I…I am with child. (Flash) And I didn’t want to say anything because it’s your day; I didn’t want to steal your thunder.
Si yo espero un hijo. Y no quise decir nada para no arruinar tu día...

Monica: Wait a minute! So you told people I was pregnant?! (Flash) Does this look like a conversation that I want to remember?!
Por eso le dijiste a la gente que yo estaba embarazada?
Parece este un momento para recordar?

Chandler: Who’s the father?
Quién es el padre?

Monica: Yeah!

Phoebe: I can’t say.
No puedo decirlo.

Monica: Why?!

Chandler: Why not?
Porque no?

Phoebe: I can’t say because he’s famous.
No lo puedo decir porque el es famoso.

Rachel: Oh my God, who is it?! (Phoebe rolls her eyes.)
Oh, Dios, quien es?

Monica: Phoebe, come on, you have to tell us.
Vamos Phoebe tienes que decirnoslo...

Phoebe: Okay, okay. It’s James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of my baby.
Esta bien, es James Brolin.
James Brolin es el padre de mi bebe.

Chandler: As in Barbara Streisand’s husband James Brolin?
El esposo de Barbra Streisand?

Phoebe: What?! Well he never said that to me!
Que, el nunca me dijo eso...


Opening Credits
[Scene: The Wedding Hall, continued from earlier.]

Photographer: Why don’t we have Monica step away and we’ll get Chandler and the bridemaids.
Monica pongamos a Chandler y a las damas de honor.

Phoebe: How about just the bridemaids?
Porque no sólo a las damas de honor?

Chandler: Y’know I am the groom right? I was told it was kinda big deal.
Sabes, yo soy el novio.

Phoebe: It is.

Rachel: For you. (Chandler leaves.)

Phoebe: Oh my God!
Oh, dios!

Rachel: Oh, thank you for doing that. I just can’t deal with this just quite yet.
Gracias por hacer eso!

Phoebe: So instead you told me Monica was pregnant.
Tu dijiste que Mónica estaba embarazada.

Rachel: You said that she was, I just didn’t disagree with you.
Tu lo dijiste, yo simplemente no lo negue.

Phoebe: Sneaky.
Astuta!

Rachel: Oh yeah.

Photographer: Smile ladies.
Sonrían, señoritas!

Rachel: Oh! (They smile and the picture is taken.) Oh by the way?

Phoebe: Uh-hmm.

Rachel: James Brolin?
Por cierto, James Brolin?

Phoebe: Oh, I know. I could only think of two names, him and Ed Begley Jr. and then I remembered he’s gay.
Ya se.
Solamente pude pensar en dos nombres: él y Ed Begley Jr.
Entonces recordé que el es gay, por lo tanto. . .

Rachel: Ed Begley Jr. is not gay.
Ed Begley Jr. no es gay.

Phoebe: (intrigued) Really?!
En serio?

[Scene: The Reception Hall, the party is in full swing.]

Bandleader: Thank you very much! Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to introduce to you for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. Chandler Bing!
(They enter.)
Muchas gracias. Me da mucho plaacer presentarles a ustedes a El señor y la señora Chandler Bing!

Chandler: Before we go out there I’ve got a present for ya.
Antes de que entremos, tengo un regalo.

Monica: Honey, I’m going to put my hand in your pocket!
No voy a poner mi mano en tu bolsillo.

Chandler: No?

Monica: No.
No.

Chandler: I’ve been taking dancing lessons.
Estuve tomando lecciones de baile.

Monica: What?!
Que!

Chandler: Yeah, the last six weeks. I wanted this to be a moment you will never forget.
Si desde hace seis semanas.

Monica: Oh that is so sweet!
Eso es muy dulce

Chandler: So? Would you care to join me in our first dance as husband and wife?
Entonces me acompañiarías en nuestro primer baile como marido y mujer?

Monica: Yes.
Si

(They walk onto the dance floor and Chandler slips and almost falls.)

Monica: What’s the matter?
Que pasa?

Chandler: I don’t know, it’s these new shoes, they’re all slippery.
Estos zapatos nuevos son resbaladizos.

Monica: Well, are you going to be able to do this?
Vas a poder hacer esto?

Chandler: Not well.
No muy bien.

(They start dancing and Chandler starts slipping around.)
Monica: Well, the good news is, I don’t think anyone’s looking at us.
La buenas noticia es que nadie nos esta mirando.

[Cut to Phoebe and Rachel at their table.]
Phoebe: So, are you ready to talk about it?
Estas lista para hablar de eso?

Rachel: No.
No.

(Pause)
Phoebe: Now?
Ahora?

Rachel: No!

Phoebe: Okay, we’ll talk about something else then.
Hablemos de otra cosa

Rachel: Thank you.

Phoebe: Who’s the father?!
Quien es el padre?

Rachel: Ugh! Look honey y’know what? I haven’t told him yet, so until I do I don’t think I should tell anybody else.
No le he dicho todavía, así que no creo que deba decirselo a nadie más.

Phoebe: Yeah. That’s fine. That’s fair. Is it Tag?
eso es justo... Es Tag....?

Rachel: Phoebe!!
Oh Phoebe...

Phoebe: Okay, I’m sorry. I’ll stop.
Perdón, voy a parar.

Rachel: Okay.

Phoebe: Is it Ross? It’s Ross isn’t it—Oh my God, it’s Joey!
Es Ross?
Oh, dios, es Joey!

Rachel: Honey, stop it! I am not going to tell you until I tell him.
Basta. No te lo voy a decir hasta que se lo diga a él.

Phoebe: Ah-hah! At least we know it’s a him.
Al menos sabemos que es un él.

[Cut to Joey entering wearing a preppy tennis outfit.]

Monica: (seeing him) Oh sweet Lord.
Oh, dios mio.

Joey: I’m sorry! Okay? I went down to the gift shop and it’s either this or a bathrobe! Look, what’s more important, the way I’m dressed or me being with you on your special day?
Lo siento ok. Fui a la tienda de regalos y era esto o una bata de baño.
Que es más importante? Mi ropa o que esté aquí hoy?

Monica: Honey, I’m not even going to pretend I was listening. (Sees someone else.) Hey! Hey! (Goes over to that person.)
Ni siquiera voy a prentender estar escuchandote.

[Cut to the hallway outside the room, Ross is going to see which table he’s at and sees a beautiful woman doing the same thing.]

Ross: Hi. I’m uh, I’m Ross. I don’t, I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Monica’s older brother.
Hola soy Ross. No creo que nos conoscamos Soy el hermano de Monica.

Woman: Oh hi, I’m, I’m Mona from her restaurant.
Hola, soy Mona del restaurant.

Ross: Oh! Hello uh, Mona from her restaurant. (He uses his card to mouth those words.) (Pause) Mona, wow what a, what a beautiful name.
Hola, "Mona del restaurant. " Mona. Que nombre tan hermoso.

Mona: You think so? I’ve always kinda hated it.
Crees eso... yo siempre lo he odiado.

Ross: Aw come on, Mona Lisa?
Vamos! Mona Lisa?

Mona: Uh-huh.

Ross: Mona umm…Clickclocken. The famous botanist? Huh? Oh no she’s uh—well she’s dead now. No, supposedly she was once quite the hottie of the plant world.
Mona. . .. . .Klegglachen? La famosa botanica... Ella.... Bueno, ella está muerta ahora.
Pero ella era la belleza del mundo de las plantas.

Mona: Really?! Well see? I never knew about her.
En serio...Nunca escuche hablar sobre ella.

Ross: Linda Clickclocken. (Pause) So what uh, what-what table are you at? (She shows him.) Oh, uh me too.
Linda Klegglachen. . . . En que mesa estás?

Mona: Oh good. Now there’ll be someone there who likes my name.
Yo tambien.. Que suerte. Habrá alguién al que le gusta mi nombre.

Ross: (sexily) Yes there will. (Mona leaves and Ross tries to find the same table.) Oh guess what, Molly Gilbert you’ve just been bumped up to table one. And if it’s all right with you I’m gonna take your place at table six—Martin Clickclocken.
Si, lo habrá. Adivina que, Molly Gilbert. Has sido cambiada a la mesa uno.
Si estás de acuerdo, Yo voy a tomar tu lugar en la mesa seis.
Martin Klegglachen!

[Cut back inside to Joey giving a beautiful woman a tennis lesson by standing behind her.]

Joey: That’s better, now just bend your arms a little more. There you go. Okay, look straight ahead. Now this time I want you to really put your ass into it. (They do a practice swing and she really puts her ass into it.)
Eso esta mejor. Curva tus brazos, mira derecho hacia adelante.
Esta vez, realmente pone tu trasero en esto.

[Cut to Chandler sitting down near Joey as his mom walks over. His birth mother, not the mother who recently visited one of those clinics in Sweden.]

Mrs. Bing: Chandler darling! Look, my date has finally arrived. I’d like you to meet Dennis Phillips.
Chandler querido... mi cita ha llegado. Quiero que conozcas a Dennis Phillips.

Dennis Phillips: Congratulations.
Felicitaciones.

Chandler: Thank you.
Gracias

Mrs. Bing: Dennis is a dear old friend and a fantastic lover.
Dennis es un viejo amigo. Y un amante fantástico.

Chandler: Bravo Dennis thanks for pleasing my mother so.
Bravo, Dennis, gracias por complacer tanto a mi madre.

Dennis Phillips: Oh, I’m so sorry I missed the ceremony, I was stuck at auditions.
Me perdí la ceremonia porque estaba en audiciones.

Mrs. Bing: Oh yes, Dennis is directing a new Broadway show.
Dennis esta dirigiendo un show de Broadway.

Joey: I don’t believe we’ve met, Joey Tribbiani.
Perdon no creo que nos conozcamos. Joey Tribbiani.

Dennis Phillips: Dennis Phillips

Joey: Wow, I’ve admired your work for years. You-you’ve done some really amazing stuff.
Yo he admirado su trabajo por años.

Dennis Phillips: Oh, thank you. Well if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go get myself a drink. Be back in a moment. (Walks away.)
Gracias Disculpenme, voy a buscarme un trago. Volveré en un momento.

Joey: Wow Dennis Phillips! That’s great! How did you guys meet?
Dennis Phillips! Como lo conociste?

Mrs. Bing: Well, it’s a funny story.
Es una historia graciosa.

Chandler: Funny: ha-ha or funny: (Mimes blowing his brain out.)
Graciosa "ha-ha," o graciosa--?

[Time lapse. The band is finishing another song.]

Bandleader: Thank you, thank you very muc h. If everyone will please take your seats, dinner will be served.
Gracias. Si todos toman sus asientos, la cena será servida.

(Ross starts looking for table six and finds out that it’s the kid’s table. He sees Mona sitting at another table.)

Ross: Hey! Uh, I thought, I thought you were at table six.
Pensé que estabas en la mesa seis.

Mona: No, nine. (Shows him the card again.)
No nueve...

Ross: Oh see, before you uh, when you showed it to me you-you held it that way (he turns her hand upside down) which uh, which was misleading. Well I’m… (He goes at sits down at his new table and the kids stare at him.) Hello.
Cuando me lo mostraste, lo sostuviste de esta manera. . . Lo cual.... fue engañoso.
Hola..

[Cut to the hallway, Chandler is putting tape on the bottom of his shoes.]

Joey: Chandler. Will you see if your mom can give my resume to Dennis Phillips? ‘Cause if I can get in a Broadway show then I would’ve done it all, film, television, and theater. The only think left would be radio, and that’s just for ugly people.
Puedes ver si tu mamá puede darle mi curriculum a Dennis Phillips?
Si consigo un show de Broadway, voy a haber hecho todo:
Cine, television y teatro. No radio, porque eso es para gente fea.

Chandler: What size shoes do you wear?
Que tamaño de zapatos usas?

Joey: Uh, eleven, eleven and a half.
Once, once y medio.

Chandler: Great, because my shoes are giving me a little problem on the dance floor, can I borrow the boots from your costume?
Ok porque mis zapatos me están dando un problema. Puedes prestarme tus botas?

Joey: Uh, I don’t even really know where I left those. Sorry.
No se donde las deje,asi que. . . .

Chandler: (looking at Joey’s feet) Those aren’t eleven and a half.
Esas no son once.

Joey: Okay fine! I’m a seven! All right, I have surprisingly small feet. But the rest of me is good, I’ll show ya!
Ok, bueno, calzo 7!
Esta bien, tengo pies chicos. Pero todo el resto esta bien. Te lo puedo mostrar

[Cut to Monica and Rachel at their table.]

Monica: Can you believe Phoebe got pregnant?!
No puedo creer que Phoebe este embarazada.

Rachel: Oh y’know what honey? Let’s not talk about that right now?
No hablemos de eso ahora.

Monica: This is so huge.
Es algo muy enorme.

Rachel: Sure, but come on, as big as your wedding?
Seguro, pero tan grande como tu boda?

Monica: Of course not nothing is. Between me and you…
Claro que no. Nada lo es.

Rachel: Yeah.

Monica: …in this day and age how dumb do you have to be to get pregnant?
En estos días y a su edad, que tonta hay que ser para quedar embarazada?

Rachel: Hey! Y’know, sometimes you can do everything right, everyone can wear everything they’re supposed to wear, and one of those little guys just gets through!
Algunas veces puedes puedes usar correctamente todo lo que se supone que uses. .
. . .y uno de esos pequeños hombrecitos simplemente llega.

Monica: How?
Cómo?

Rachel: I don’t know! Maybe they have tools.
No lo sé, tal vez tienen herramientas.

Monica: Well I-I talked to and uh, she’s definitely going to have this baby. Y’know, she said she was gonna raise it on her own.
Hable con ella y dijo que definitivamente va a tener al bebé.
Lo va a criar sola.

Rachel: Well, maybe that’s, maybe that’s really brave.
Tal vez eso sea realmente valiente.

Monica: Maybe. I just hope she realizes how hard it’s gonna be.
Yo solamente espero que se de cuenta lo duro que va a ser.

Rachel: Maybe she hasn’t really thought it through that well.
Tal vez ella no lo penso tanto a fondo tanto.

Monica: Well, there’s a lot to think about. I mean, how is she, how is she going to handle this financially? How is she going to juggle work? Does she realize she’s not going to have a date again for the next eighteen years?
Hay mucho para pensar. Me refiero... Como lo va a hacer financieramente?
Va a tener que trabajar el doble. Se da cuenta que no va a tener una cita en los próximos 18 años?

Rachel: (starting to cry) I don’t know.
No lo sé.

Monica: Are you okay?
Estás bien.

Rachel: Uh-hmm. I’m just thinking about Phoebe; poor knocked up Phoebe.
Solamente estoy pensando en Phoebe en la pobre, Phoebe embarazada.

Waiter: Champagne?
Champagne?

Rachel: Oh yes! Thank you very much! (She grabs a glass, takes a sip, and realizes what she just did. She then tries to spit the champagne back into the glass without Monica noticing. It doesn’t work.) Oh that’s-that’s actually how the French drink it.
(Monica gasps.)
Oh si Muchas gracias. Es la forma en que lo beben los franceses.


Commercial Break

[Scene: continued from earlier, only now Phoebe joins them.]

Phoebe: Well, I just got off the phone with my lover, James Brolin…
Bueno, acabo de hablar por teléfono con mi amante, James Brolin.

Monica: Oh really?!
De veras?

Phoebe: Yes, and apparently he is married to some singer, but he said he would leave her for me. And I said, "James, James Brolin, are you sure?" James Brolin said…
Y el está realmente casado con una cantante.
Pero dijo que la dejará por mí. Y yo le dije, "Estás seguro?"
Y el dijo

Monica: (interrupting) Rachel’s really the one who’s pregnant.
Rachel esta embarazada?

Phoebe: (shocked) What?! (deadpan) Why bother?
Qué?

Para que molestarse?

Monica: How do you feel?
Como te sientes?

Rachel: I don’t know. I don’t know how I feel. This is all happening so fast. I have to make all these decisions that I don’t want to make. (Takes another sip of champagne and spits it back out) Somebody just take this away from me!!
No sé, no sé como me siento.
Todo a pasado muy rapido... Y tengo que tomar desiciones que no quiero tomar
Que alguién aleje esto de mí!

Phoebe: Calm down. Maybe you’re not pregnant.
Calmate, tal vez no estás embarazada.

Rachel: What?!
Que?

Phoebe: When I got pregnant with the triplets, I took that test like three times just to make sure.
Cuando yo quedé embarazada, tomé el examen tres veces.

Monica: Yes! Maybe it’s a false positive. Are you sure you peed on the stick right?
Sí. Estás segura de que hiciste bien pipi en el palito?

Rachel: How many ways are there to do that?
Cuántas maneras hay?

Phoebe: I’m-I’m just saying, don’t freak out until you’re a hundred percent sure.
Solamente estoy diciendo, que no te asustes hasta estar segura.

Rachel: All right, I’ll-I’ll take it again when I get home.
Lo voy a hacer de nuevo en casa.

Monica: You-you gotta take it now. Come on, do it as a present to me.
Lo tienes que hacer ahora, como un regalo para mí.

Rachel: Okay. Thank you.
Ok. Gracias.

Monica: Okay.

Phoebe: I’ll run out and get you one.
Iré afuera y comprare uno.

Rachel: Oh, you guys are so great.
Eres genial.

Monica: Oh, wait a minute! Who’s is the father?!
Espera un minuto. Quien es el padre?

Phoebe: Oh no, she won’t tell us.
Ella no quiere decirlo.

Monica: Oh, come on it’s my wedding! That can be my present.
Vamos! es mi boda. Ese podría ser mi regalo.

Rachel: Wh—Hey, I just gave you peeing on a stick.
Te acabo de dar pis en un palito.



Phoebe: See? This is why you register.
Esta es la razón por lo que te registras.

[Cut to Ross at the kiddie table. He reaches for something and a fart noise emanates which causes the kids to laugh.]

Ross: It was the chair again! Okay? I’m not doing it! It what—look, I don’t—y’know what—eh-eh… (He walks away and goes over to Mona.) Hi.
Fué la silla otra vez. Yo no lo estoy haciendo!
Fué....Mirá, yo no soy. Sabés que. . .?

Mona: Hi!
Hola.

Ross: Umm, would you like to dance?
Te gustaría bailar?



Mona: Sure.
Seguro.

Ross: Yeah?

Mona: Yeah.

Ross: Oh great! (They get up to dance and Ross is interrupted by a little girl.)

Little Girl: Dr. Geller?
Dr. Geller?

Ross: I wasn’t farting! (To Mona) Uh, a little game from our table. (To the little girl) Yes?
No me estaba tirando pedos!
Un pequeño juego que teniamos nuestra mesa. Si?

Little Girl: Dr. Geller, will you dance with me?
Dr. Geller, bailaría conmigo?

Ross: Oh umm, well uh, maybe-maybe later. Right now, I’m about to dance with this lady.
Tal vez después. Voy a bailar con esta señorita.

Little Girl: Okay. (She drops her head in disappointment and walks away.)
Ok.

Mona: Ohhhh!

Ross: Uh, unless! Unless, uh this lady wouldn’t mind letting you go first.
A menos que a esta señorita no le importe dejarte ser primera.

Mona: I’d be happy to. (To Ross) You are very sweet.
No me importaría. Eres muy dulce.

Ross: Yes I-I am. In fact umm hey, why don’t we try it my special way? You can dance on my feet.
Si lo soy.
De hecho, tratemos de mi forma especial. Puedes bailar sobre mis pies.

Little Girl: Sure!
Claro.

Ross: Yeah? Hop on. (They start dancing and Mona sits down.) Is the pretty lady looking?
Esta mirando la señorita linda?

Little Girl: Uh-huh.

Ross: Keep dancing.
sigue bailando.

[Cut to Chandler in the hallway practicing dancing and is doing it very well.]

Chandler: And the world will never know.
Y el mundo nunca sabra.

Joey: Hey! Did you talk to Dennis about me yet?
Hablaste con Dennis?

Chandler: Yes, I told him how talented you were. I told him all about Days Of Our Lives.
Si le dije que talentoso eres. Y le hable sobre Days of our Lives.

Joey: No-no! No! No! You don’t tell a Broadway guy that! Now he just thinks I’m a soap actor.
No, no le digas eso! El va a pensar que solo soy un actor de novelas.

Chandler: But you’re not just a soap actor. You are a soap actor with freakishly tiny feet.
Pero tu no lo eres! Eres un actor de novelas con los pies monstruosamente pequeños.

Joey: Hey!

[Joey walks back inside just as Ross’s dance is finishing.]

Little Girl: Thank you.
Gracias.

Ross: No-no, thank you Miranda.
No, gracias a ti, Miranda.

Little Girl: Melinda!
Melinda.

Ross: All right. (Walks over to Mona.)
Esta bien.

Mona: How cute was that?
Que lindo fue eso

Ross: Oh-oh, were you, were you watching?
Estabas mirando?

(Another little girl walks over to him.)

Second Girl: Can I go next?
Puedo ser la siguiente?

Ross: What? Of course you can! Hop on!
Por supuesto que puedes, vamos.

Mona: Okay, but I get to hop on after her. (Ross bites the air in response.)
Ok pero me toca subir después de ella.

Ross: I am so gonna score.
Voy a anotar!

Second Girl: What?
Que?

Ross: I like your bow.
Que me gusta tu lazo.

[Behind them, Joey goes up to the bandleader and interrupts the song.]

Joey: (clinks his glass) I’d like to propose a toast. To Monica and Chandler, the greatest couple in the world. And my best friends. Now, my when I first found out they were getting married I was, I was a little angry. I was like, (overly angry) "Why God? Why? How can you take them away from me?!" But then I thought back over all our memories together, some happy memories. (Does a fake laugh.) And-and there was some sad memories. (Starts to break down and cry.) I’m sorry. And-and some scared memories—Whoa! (He jumps back, startled.) Eh? And then, and then I realized I’ll always be their friend, their friend who can speak in many dialects and has training in stage combat and is willing to do partial nudity. (Starts to walk away, but realizes something.) Oh! To the happy couple!

[Time Lapse, the interrupted song is finishing.]

Me gustaría proponer un brindis por Monica y Chandler. . .. . .la mejor pareja en el mundo, y mis mejores amigos.
Cuando me enteré que se iban a casar, estaba un poco enojado.
"Porque, dios? Cómo puedes llevarlos lejos de mí?! "
Pero entonces pensé de nuevo en nuestros recuerdos juntos.
Recuerdos felices.
Y algunos recuerdos tristes.
Lo siento.
Y otros recuerdos que asustan.
Y entonces me dí cuenta que siempre seré su amigo.
Un amigo que puede hablar en muchos dialectos. . .
. . .tiene entrenamiento en combate en escena y esta dispuesto a hacer desnudos parciales.
Oh...por la pareja feliz.

Bandleader: Thank you.

Ross: (to the second girl) That was very nice Ashley.
Eso fue lindo.

Ashley: Can we do it again?
Podemos hacerlo de nuevo?

Ross: No-no. (Walks over to Mona again.)
No,no.

Mona: So, is it my turn now?
Entonces es mi turno?

(A large little fat girl walks over.)

Fat Girl: I’m next!
Yo soy la siguiente.

Ross: Oh! (Recoils in horror.)

Mona: Uh, that’s okay. You can dance with her first.
Ok, puedes bailar con ella primero.

Ross: Oh, you-you sure? (She nods yes.) Okay. (To the girl) Okay. So what’s uh, what’s your name.
Estás segura? Cual es tu nombre?

Fat Girl: Gert!
Gert.

Ross: That’s, that’s pretty. (They start to dance and Gert tries to step on Ross’s feet, but he pulls them out of harm’s way.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing there Gert?
Es lindo.
Que estás haciendo, Gert?

Gert: Dancing on your feet! Like the other girls did it.
Bailando sobre tus pies como las otras chicas.

Ross: Okay. (Swallows hard.) Hop on Gert. (She does and Ross winces in pain.)
Esta bien, Sube Gert.

Gert: Why aren’t you moving your feet?
Porque no estás moviendo tus pies?

Ross: I’m trying. (He strains to move his feet.)
Estoy tratando.

Gert: Faster! You’re not going fast enough!
No estás moviendote lo suficientemente rápido.

Ross: Maybe I should stand on your feet! (Gert’s shocked and Ross realizes what he said and tries to brush it off.)
Tal vez yo tendría que estar sobre tus pies!

[Cut to Joey going over to talk to Dennis Phillips.]

Joey: So did you uh, happen to catch my toast up there?
Entonces, pudo escuchar mi brindis?

Dennis Phillips: Oh my God, that was for my benefit?
Fue para mi beneficio?

Joey: Well, I’d like to think there was something for everyone. Look, I know you’re casting for this new show…
Había algo para cada uno.
Se que estás haciendo un castig para un show.

Dennis Phillips: Look umm Joey, I-I don’t think you’re quite right for this project.
No creo que seas bueno para eso.

Joey: Oh, see that’s where you’re wrong. Whatever it is I can do it. And if didn’t see it up there, just-just try me.
Estás equivodado. Sea lo que sea, yo puedo hacerlo.
Pruebeme.

Dennis Phillips: It’s an all Chinese cast. Can you be Chinese?
Es un elenco de personas chinas.
Puedes ser chino?

Joey: Well I’m not proud of this, but… (He turns around and starts to mess with his eyelids.)
No estoy orgulloso de esto, pero. . . .

Dennis Phillips: Oh my God! No-no-no! Please! Please! Don’t-don’t-don’t!
No, por favor!

[Cut to Monica walking up to Chandler.]

Monica: Hey, are you ready to get back on the dance floor?
Quieres volver a la pista de baile?

Chandler: Did it turn into sand?
Se convirtió en arena?

Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, you’ll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Vamos, estarás bien.

Chandler: (sliding up behind her) No. No, I won’t. Do you know why I took all those lessons? See, for the first time I didn’t want you to be embarrassed to be seen on the dance floor with some clumsy idiot.
No, no lo estaré.
Sabes porqué tome todas esas lecciones?
No quiería que estuvieras avergonzada de ser vista con algún idiota torpe.

Monica: Oh sweetie, you can never embarrass me. (Chandler grunts.) Okay, you can easily embarrass me. But come on, it doesn’t matter. All right? I married you! So I want to dance on my wedding night with my husband. Come on. (They go onto the floor.) Just try not to move your feet at all. (Chandler starts to get into the groove and bust a move.) There you go.
(Mr. Geller dances over.)
Oh cariño nunca podrías avergonzarme. Ok, puedes hacerlo facilmente.
Pero no me importa.
Yo me casé contigo. Así que voy a bailar con mi esposo.
Sólo intenta no mover para nada tus pies.

Mr. Geller: Chandler, I’m gonna have you arrested.
Voy a tener que arrestarte.

Chandler: Why?

Mr. Geller: You stole my moves. (He starts to dance like Chandler was and Chandler stops.)
Te robaste mis movimientos.

[Scene: The Women’s Restroom, Rachel and Phoebe are waiting for the outcome of Rachel’s second test.]

Rachel: How much longer?
Cuanto tiempo más?

Phoebe: 30 seconds.
Treinta segundos.

Rachel: 30 seconds, okay.

Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if it’s positive, we’re gonna…
Me lo perdí?
Rachel, quiero que sepas. . .. . .que si es positivo, nosotras...

Rachel: Oh I know. I know. (They hug.)
Lo sé.

Phoebe: It’s time.
Ya es tiempo.

(Another woman starts to enter.)

The Girls: No!! (The woman backs out.)
no.

Monica: Go ahead Rach.
(She goes over to look.)
Adelante, Rach.

Rachel: Oh wait! Y’know what? I can’t, I can’t look at it. I can’t. Somebody else tell me, somebody tell me.
No puedo mirarlo. Alguien digamelo.

Phoebe: Okay.

Rachel: Okay.

Phoebe: Umm, it’s negative.
Es negativo.

Rachel: What?
Que...

Phoebe: It’s negative.
Es negativo.

Rachel: Oh. Oh. Well there you go. Whew! (Pause) That is—that’s great—that is really great-great news. (Pause) Y’know ‘cause the whole not being ready and kinda the financial aspects, all that. Whew. Wow, this is so just the way it was supposed to be. (Starts to cry.) God.
Bueno, ahí esta. Esas son noticias realmente buenas.
Ya saben por todo el asunto. . .. . .de no estar preparada, los aspectos financieros, todo eso. . . .
Esta es simplemente la forma en que se suponía que fuera.

Monica: Well… Well, great.
Entonces es genial...

Phoebe: Here. (Gives Rachel a tissue.)

Rachel: Thanks. (Crying) God this is so stupid! (Pause) How could I be upset over something I never had? It’s negative?
Cómo puedo estar molesta por algo que nunca tuve?
Es negativo?

Phoebe: No, it’s positive.
No, es positivo.

Rachel: What?!
Qué?

Phoebe: It’s-it’s not negative, it’s positive.
No es negativo, es positivo.

Rachel: Are you sure?
Estás segura?

Phoebe: Well yeah, I lied before.
Si, yo mentí antes.

Rachel: Oh!

Monica: Oh God…

Phoebe: Now you know how you really feel about it.
Ahora sabes como te sientes realmente

Rachel: Oh-oh, that’s a risky little game!
Ese es juego arriesgado.

Monica: Are you really gonna do this?
Realmente vas a hacer esto?

Rachel: Yeah. I’m gonna have a baby. I’m gonna have a baby. I’m gonna have a baby! (They all hug.)
Si, voy a tener un bebé... Voy a tener un bebé!
Voy a tener un bebé!

Phoebe: With who?
Con quién?

Rachel: Ah, it’s still not the time.
No, todavía no es el momento.



Dedicated to the People of New York City
Closing Credits

[Scene: The Reception, Joey is helping Ross walk after Gert got through with him and Mona is looking on concerned.]

Ross: I just didn’t see the fast song coming.
Yo no me dí cuenta que venía la canción rápida.

Joey: Shh. Shh. Don’t try to talk, we’ll get you up to your room, we’ll soak your feet, you’ll be okay.
No trates de hablar. Te llevaremos hasta tu cuarto, remoja tus pies.

Ross: Oh, thank you.
Oh... Gracias

Mona: That is so sweet!
Eso es tán dulce!

Joey: Yeah.

Mona: No, I mean it. There are so few genuinely nice guys out there.
Hay tan pocos chicos realmente buenos allá afuera.

Joey: Tell me about it, I feel like I’m holding down the fort all by myself.
Siento que estoy manteniendo el fuerte yo solo.

Mona: It’s Joey right?
Eres Joey, no?

Joey: Yeah.
Si.

Ross: Wait a minute! No! I’m the nice one! I’m the one who danced with the kids all night! How…How small are your feet?! (They all look down.)
Espera un minuto! Yo soy el chico bueno!
Yo bailé con las niñas toda la noche. Que pequeños son tus pies?
Espera un minuto! Yo soy el chico bueno!
Yo bailé con las niñas toda la noche. Que pequeños son tus pies?

End

The One With Rachel’s New Dress

Teleplay by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin
Story by: Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Chandler are there as Phoebe enters carrying a drum.]

Phoebe: Hey!

Hola.

Chandler: Hey! Wow, it is true what they say, pregnant bellies look like a drum.

Hola.

Es verdad lo que se dice! La barriga de una embarazada parece un bombo!

Phoebe: (not amused) Ha-ha. (She sits down on the couch.) No, it’s just I’m so pregnant that I—my guitar doesn’t fit anymore. So I thought ‘til I’m not, I’m just gonna play all my songs on this drum. It sounds really cool!

No, es que ahora estoy tan gorda que no puedo cargar ni con mi guitarra.....

Asi que hasta que de a luz tocare mis canciones con este tambor. Y suena super!

Chandler: All right.

Phoebe: Listen. Listen. (She starts to play and sing.) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?

Escuchen.

Joey: Wow, Pheebs! That sounds great!

Phoebe suena genial!

Phoebe: I know! I know, and I’ve only been playing for like an hour!

Lo se.

Lo se! Y eso que solo llevo practicando una hora...

Alice: (entering) Phoebe! Phoebe! Hi! Hi!

Phoebe! Phoebe! Hola.

Phoebe: Hey! What are you doing here?

Hola, que estas haciendo aqui?

Alice: Umm, actually, I came down to ask you a big favour.

De hecho he venido a pedirte un gran favor...

Phoebe: Oh, well, don’t tell me you want to keep more of your stuff in my uterus.

No me digas que quieres guardar mas cosas en mi utero.

Alice: (laughs) No. No. No. (Sits down.) Okay, now, see, I wanna name the girl baby Leslie, and Frank wants to name one of the boy babies Frank JR. JR.

No, no, no.

Bueno, veras....Yo quiero ponerle a la nina Leslie...

Y Frank quiere ponerle a uno de los ninos....." Frank Jr, Jr".

Chandler: Wouldn’t that be Frank the III?

Eso no seria Frank III?

Alice: Don’t get me started. (To Phoebe) Anyway, umm, since there are three babies and umm, we both got to put our names in, we would be truly honoured if you named the other boy baby.

No me hagas hablar del tema.

Bueno, como hay tres bebes, y los dos ya hemos elegido nuestros nombres...

Seria un verdadero honor que tu le pusieras el nombre al otro nino!

Phoebe: Wow! That’s so great! Oh! Oh! Cougar.

Que bien! Pongamosle "Puma".

Alice: You think about it. (Leaves)

Piensalo un poco.

Opening Credits

[Scene: Ross’s apartment, he and Emily are getting ready to go to the airport.]

Emily: I left a bra drying on the shower rod, you don’t think your son will think it’s yours and be horribly traumatised?

Deje un sosten colgado en la ducha... Crees que tu hijo le dara un trauma si piensa que es tuyo?

Ross: Hey, if mommy can have a wife, daddy can have a bra.

Si su mama puede tener una esposa, papa puede tener un sosten...

Emily: (checks the clock) Ohh, it’s time to go.

Bueno, ya es hora de irme....

Ross: Oh, no-no-no, see, that-that clock’s a little fast, uh, we have 17 minutes. Huh, what can we do in 17 minutes? Twice?

No, no, no... Veras, ese reloj va adelantado, aun nos quedan diecisiete minutos...

Que podriamos hacer en diecisiete minutos... dos veces?

Emily: Well that’s ambitious.

Eso es ser ambicioso!

(They kiss but are interrupted by a knock on the door.)

Ross: Hey, uh, you can ignore that.

Ignora ese ruido, solo es...

Emily: That’s Carol with your son!

Es Carol con tu hijo...

Ross: Uhh, believe me when he’s older, he’ll understand.

Creeme, cuando sea mayor lo entendera todo.

Carol: (knocking on the door) Ross!

Ross?

Ross: I’ll be right there. (He goes over and opens the door to Carol, Susan, and Ben.) (To Ben.) Hello! (To Carol.) Hello! (To Susan.) Hey. Uhh, Emily, this is Carol and Susan.

Ya voy.

Emily, estas son Carol y Susan.

Susan: Hey, it’s so nice to finally meet you!

Hola! Me alegro de conocerte.

Emily: Me too!

Yo tambien.

Carol: Ohh, y’know, Susan’s gonna be shooting a commercial in London next week.

Sabes? La semana que viene Susan filmara un comercial en Londres.

Susan: Oh yeah, I’m so excited, I’ve never been there.

Si! Estoy muy emocionada, nunca he estado alla!

Emily: Oh, well, I’ll show you around.

Te puedo mostrar la ciudad.

Susan: That would be great! Also, uh, I was hoping to catch a show so if you can make any suggestions…

Eso seria genial.

Y tambien tengo ganas de ver algun espectaculo, asi que si tienes alguna recomendacion...

Emily: Oh, there’s tonnes of terrific stuff—I’ll go with you!

Oh, hay muchas cosas que valen la pena...Te acompanare.

Susan: Ahh!

(Ross accidentally, on purpose, bumps into Susan.)

Ross: Look at you two, bonding, making us late for the airport so…

Lo siento... es que las escuche hacer planes, pero llegaremos tarde al aeropuerto... pues...

Emily: Are you all right?

Estas bien?

Susan: Oh, he’s fine. He’s fine. It’s just that us getting along is difficult for him, because he doesn’t like me.

Estoy bien.

Le cuesta llevar la situacion porque yo no le caigo nada bien...

Ross: Oh come on! That’s-that’s… true.

Que?. Vamos, vamos... Eso...! ...Eso es cierto.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are playing foosball as Phoebe enters.]

Phoebe: Hi!

Hola.

Joey: Hey!

Hola.

Chandler: Hey! Do we have a baby name yet?

Ya tienes un nombre para el bebe?

Phoebe: Ugh! No! This is so hard! I went through this whole book (Holds up a book) and found nothing! I want a name that’s really like, y’know strong and confident, y’know? Like-like Exxon.

No.

Es muy dificil.

Me he leido el libro entero y no he encontrado nada!

Quiero un nombre que tenga bastante fuerza y de confianza... ya saben, como Exxon...

Chandler: Well, it certainly worked for that Valdez kid.

La verdad, eso salio bien con el Valdez ese..

Joey: Ooh-ooh, Pheebs, you want a strong name? How about, The Hulk?

Phoebe! Quieres un nombre con fuerza? Que tal... "The Hulk"?

Phoebe: No, I’m-I’m not sure about Hulk, but I like the idea of a name starting with "The."

No, no tengo muy claro lo de "Hulk"... Pero me gusta la idea de un nombre que empiece por "La"!

Joey: Oh, want a good name, go with Joey. Joey’s your pal. Joey’s your buddy. "Where is everybody?" "Well, they’re hanging out with Joey."

Bueno, si quieres un buen nombre elige Joey.

Joey es tu amigo, Joey es tu companero.Donde esta todo el mundo?

Pasando el rato con Joey!

Chandler: Hey, y’know what, if you’re gonna do that, if you’re gonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. (Phoebe doesn’t think so.) Oh, come on! Chandler’s funny, sophisticated, and he’s very loveable, once you get to know him.

Phoebe, si vas a hacer eso y llamarlo Joey, mejor ponle Chandler...

Piensalo!. Chandler es gracioso, sofisticado, y resulta muy agradable una vez que lo has conocido!

Joey: Oh well, hey, Joey’s loveable too! But the thing about Joey is, if you need him, he’ll be there.

Joey tambien es muy agradable, y lo bueno de Joey es que cuando lo necesites alli estara!

Chandler: Well, Chandler will be there for you too. I mean, well, he might be a little late, but-but, he’ll be there. And he’ll bring you some cold soda, if want you need him for is that you’re really hot.

Chandler tambien estara alli.

Quiero decir, puede que llegue tarde, pero... pero alli estara el!

Y te llevara un refresco, por si lo nesecitas, ya sabes por si tienes calor.

Joey: What do ya say? What do ya say?

Que dices?

Phoebe: Well, I, I like the idea of naming him after someone I love, and Joey and Chandler are great names. (They both stare at her.) But, all right, I don’t—maybe I’ll just name him The Hulk.

Bueno, me gusta la idea de ponerle el nombre de alguien que yo quiera....

Y tanto Joey como Chandler son unos nombres geniales...

Quizas, le ponga "The Hulk".

Joey: I knew I shouldn’t have mentioned it! That’s what I wanted to name my kid!

No deberia habertelo dicho... Asi era como queria llamar a mi hijo!

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]

Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. (She’s holding two frilly, lace nighties.)

Monica, si tienes la esperanza de acostarte con Joshuaesta noche,......

Cual de estos dos conjuntos te pondrias.

Monica: Y’know what? It really creeps me out choosing other people’s sex clothes.

No se, me pone nerviosa elegir la ropa erotica de los demas.

Rachel: Sorry. I’m so exited! I’ve been waiting for this for months! I got my hair coloured! I got new sheets! I’m making him a very fancy meal.

Lo siento, pero estoy tan emocionada!

Llevo meses esperando este momento!

Me teni el pelo, he cambiado las sabanas y...

Le estoy preparando una cena muy lujosa....

Monica: Um-hmm.

Rachel: What am I making him by the way?

Por cierto que estas preparando?

Monica: Well, you’re making him a frieze salad with goat cheese and pine nuts, wild nuts, wild rice, roast asparagus, and salmon au croup.

Pues le estas preparando una ensalada Frieze con queso de cabra y pinones.....

Arroz salvaje; esparragos asados y salmon Au Crup.

Rachel: I thought I was making him filet mignon?

Creia que preparaba Filet mignon...

Monica: Yeah, you were, but you decided to make salmon because you had some left over at the restaurant. And then you realised if you (Points at Rachel) bitched about it, then you (Points to herself) would stop cooking, and you (Points at Rachel) would have to make your famous baked potato and Diet Coke.

Si, pero luego decidiste prepararle salmon porque te sobro un poco en el restaurante.....

Y te diste cuenta de que si protestabas por el cambio dejarias de cocinar.....

Y tu tendrias que preparar tus famosas patatas con coca cola diet.

Rachel: Wow, I really get crabby when I cook.

Me altero mucho cuando cocino.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]

Ross: Hey!

Joey: Hey!

Chandler: Hey!

Ross: So uh, Emily called last night…

Bueno! Emily llamo anoche...

Chandler: And now you’re giving me the message!

Y ahora me vienes a dar el recado.

Ross: Turns out them Emily is just crazy about Susan. Yeah, they’re going to the theatre together! They’re going to dinner! They’re going horseback riding!

Resulta que Emily esta loca por Susan.

Si, van a ir juntas al teatro... Van a ir a cenar....

Van a ir a montar a caballo!

Phoebe: God, Susan is so fun!

Susan si que es divertida!

Ross: Look, this is just a little too familiar, okay? For like, for like six months before Carol and I spilt up, all I heard was: "My friend Susan is so smart. My friend Susan is so funny. My friend Susan is so great."

Miren, esto me parece un poco familiar, ok?

Durante casi seis meses antes de que Carol y yo nos separasemos lo unico que oia era:

"Mi amiga Susan es tan inteligente!"

"Mi amiga Susan es tan divertida!" "Mi amiga Susan es tan genial!".

Chandler: You actually think that something can happen between Emily and Susan?

De verdad crees que podria pasar algo entre Emily y Susan?

Ross: Hey, they’re going to the gym together! Two women! Stretching! Y’know they-they take a steam together! Things get a little playful—didn’t you see Personal Best?

Van juntas al gimnasio!. Que horror!!.

Dos mujeres sudorosas... Ya se sabe!

Van juntas al sauna, empiezan a juguetear....

No han visto Servicios Personales?!

Joey: No, but I’m gonna!

No, pero la vere.

Chandler: Hi! Hi! You’re crazy! Okay? This is Emily. Emily is straight.

Hola, hola estas loco!

Se trata de Emily, y Emily es heterosexual!

Ross: How do you know? I mean we thought Carol was straight before I married her!

Como lo sabes? Yo pensaba lo mismo de Carol antes de casarme con ella...

Phoebe: Yeah, I definitely. I don’t like the name Ross.

Si, definitivamente no me gusta el nombre Ross.

Ross: What a weird way to kick me when I’m down.

Que manera tan extrana de poner el dedo en la llaga!

Phoebe: No! No! I-I meant for the baby!

No, no! Quiero decir, para el bebe.

Ross: Oh. What’s wrong with Ross?

Que tiene de malo Ross?

Phoebe: Well, it’s just y’know that something like this would never to like The Hulk, y’know…

Ya sabes, es que nunca le pasaria algo asi a alguien que se llamase "Hulk".

Ross: Actually that-that’s not true, in The Incredible Hulk uh, No. 72, Dr. Bruce Banner found… (Sees everyone staring at him and stops.) Y’know, ugh, nevermind, my girlfriend’s a lesbian. (Leaves.)

Eso no es cierto: En "Hulk el hombre increible" numero setenta y dos,

el doctor Bruce Banner descubre que..

En fin, no importa! Mi novia es lesbiana!

Phoebe: So, I decided I’m definitely going to go with either Joey or Chandler.

Bien! He decidido que voy a elegir entre Joey y Chandler.

Joey: Oh! Oh-oh, you gotta pick Joey! I mean, name one famous person named Chandler.

Tienes que elegir Joey. Dime una sola persona famosa que se llame Chandler!

Chandler: Raymond Chandler.

Raymond Chandler.

Joey: Someone you didn’t make up!

Alguien que no hayas inventado.

Chandler: Okay, there are no famous Joey’s. Except for, huh, Joey Buttafucco.

Pero no hay ningun Joey famoso, excepto...... Joey Buttafucco...

Joey: Yeah, that guy really hurt us.

Si, ese tipo nos perjudico mucho!

Phoebe: Well, how about a compromise then, okay? What if it’s like y’know, Chanoey?

Si, bueno, haremos un pequeno arreglo, ok? Que tal algo como... Chanoey?

Chandler: Okay, look, Joey! Come on, think about it, first of all, he’ll never be President. There’s never gonna be a President Joey.

Ponle Joey! Vamos, piensalo!.

Para empezar, nunca sera presidente, nunca habra ningun Presidente Joey!

Joey: All right look man, I didn’t want to bring this up, but Chandler, is the stupidest name I ever heard in my life! It’s not even a name; it’s barely even a word. Okay? It’s kinda like chandelier, but it’s not! All right? It’s a stupid, stupid non-name!

Mira, no queria decirte esto, pero Chandler es el nombre mas estupido que he oido en mi vida!

Ni siquiera es un nombre, apenas es una palabra!

Se parece a "chandal"... pero no lo es!

No es mas que otro estupido y horrible nombre!

Chandler: Wow, you’re, you’re right. I have a horrible, horrible name.

Vaya... tiene razon... tengo un nombre realmente horrible!

Joey: I’m sorry man, I didn’t—I’m-I’m sorry. I’m sorry. (Goes over and comforts him.)

Lo siento, yo no queria.....lo siento.

Chandler: Okay.

Esta bien.

Joey: So I guess it’s Joey then!

Entonces tendra que ser Joey.

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]

Joshua: This is so nice. Thank you for doing this.

Esto es muy agradable, gracias por todo.

Rachel: Ohh, please! Cooking soothes me. (They kiss.) Ahh. So, dig in!

Por favor! La cocina me relaja!  A cenar!.

Joshua: Great! Oh, it all looks sooo good!

Todo se ve muy rico.

Rachel: (taking a bite) Hmmm!

Joshua: Oh my God!

Oh Dios mio!

Rachel: Oh I know, my God, this is so—this rice is so—I am so good.

Lo se.

Este arroz esta..... Soy buena cocinera!

Joshua: Behind you?

Detras de ti.

Rachel: (sees the chick and the duck) Oh, yeah, I’m sorry. They used to live here; sometimes they migrate back over.

Si!. Lo siento, antes vivian aqui y a veces vuelven en sus migraciones...

Joshua: (getting up and backing away from they.) Is there ah, is there some way they can not be here. It’s just ah, farm birds really kinda freak me out!

Existe alguna posibilidad de que no esten aqui?

Es que las aves de corral me asustan un poco.

Rachel: Yeah, sure, okay. Okay.

Si, claro, ok.

(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joey’s door.)

Joey: (answering the door.) Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. (He brings them inside.)

Hey, como hicieron eso?

[Cut back to Rachel’s date.]

Rachel: All gone! So, farm birds, huh?

Ya no estan!

Asi que te asustan las aves de corral?

Joshua: Yeah, it’s-it’s my only weird thing, I swear. And I-I-I would’ve told you about it, but I didn’t know they would be here.

Si, es mi unica mania rara, te lo juro.

Te lo habria dicho, pero no me imaginaba que estarian aqui.

Rachel: Oh.

Joshua: So, all right.

(They both sit back down.)

Rachel: Okay. So, can I serve you a little of—What? What? What? (She sees that Joshua isn’t relaxed.)

Te sirvo un poco de..... Que, que pasa?

Joshua: Nothing I uh, it’s just that I know that they’re still out there.

Nada, yo... es que... se que estan ahi fuera...

Rachel: But, they’re across the hall! I mean that’s two doors away, it would take them a long time to peck their way back over here.

Estan en el apartamento de enfrente, hay dos puertas de por medio!

Tardarian mucho tiempo en entrar aqui a picotazos!

Joshua: Okay, that’s-that’s not funny. Uhh.

No es gracioso.

Rachel: Okay, y’know, would you feel better if we went someplace else? I mean we could pack all this stuff up and y’know go to your apartment.

Te sentirias mejor si nos fueramos a otro lugar?

Podriamos tomar todo esto y llevarlo a tu apartamento.....

Joshua: Oh, they’re working on this week, it’s a total mess. But uh, I’m staying at my parents’ house, we could go there.

Lo estan arreglando esta hecho un desastre.

Pero podriamos ir a casa de mis padres?

Rachel: Your parents’?

Donde tus padres?

Joshua: Yeah, they’re out of town.

Si, estan fuera de la ciudad.

Rachel: Ohh.

Joshua: Yeah-yeah, it’s this huge place, and-and it’s got this gorgeous view of the park, and very, very romantic. What do you say?

Si, es un enorme lugar, tiene unas vistas preciosas al parque. Seria muy romantico!

Que me dices?

Rachel: Yeah that works.

Si esta bien.

(He moves to kiss her, but stops when he hears the duck.)

Joshua: They-they-they can smell fear.

Ves, ellos huelen el miedo.

[Scene: Ross’s apartment, Carol has come to pick up Ben.]

Ross: (opening the door.) Hey!

Carol: Hey! How’s Ben?

Hola. Como esta Ben?

Ross: Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat, he said, "No." I asked him if he wanted to sleep, he said, "No." I asked him what he wanted to do, he said, "No." So, he’s sweeping. (We see Ben playing with a broom and a dustpan.)

Veras, le pregunte si queria cenar y dijo que no....

Le pregunte si queria dormir, y me dijo que no....

Le pregunte que queria hacer, y me dijo no.

Asi que esta barriendo.

Carol: Hey, Ben! Hey!

Ross: So umm, any word from Susan?

Sabes algo de Susan?

Carol: Ooh, yeah! She said she’s having sooo much fun with Emily.

Dice que lo esta pasando muy bien con Emily.

Ross: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh, by the by, did it uh, did it ever occur to you that, I don’t know, maybe they might be having a little too much fun?

Por cierto, no se te ha ocurrido, no se, que a lo mejor se estan divirtiendo... demasiado?

Carol: What’s too much fun?

A que te refieres?

Ross: Y’know, the kind of fun, you and Susan had when we were married.

A la clase de diversion que tuvisteis tu y Susan cuando estabamos casados.

Carol: Oh my God, you are so paranoid!

Oh Dios mio! eres un paranoico!

Ross: Am I?!

Lo soy?

Carol: Yes!

Si!.

Ross: Am I?!

Lo soy?!.

Carol: I can’t speak for Emily, but Susan is in a loving, committed relationship.

No puedo hablar por Emily, pero Susan tiene una relacion de amor y devocion.

Ross: Uh-huh, Carol, so were we. All right, just-just imagine for a moment, Susan meets someone and-and they really hit it off. Y’know? Say-say they’re coming back from the theatre, and they-they stop at a pub for a couple of drinks, they’re laughing, y’know, someone innocently touches someone else… There’s electricity, it’s new. It’s exciting. Are you telling me there isn’t even the slightest possibility of something happening?

Carol, tu y yo la teniamos.

Bien, intenta imaginarte por un segundo que Susan conoce a alguien, y que se llevan muy bien.

Digamos que estan volviendo del teatro y van a un pub a tomar una copa.

Se rien y, bueno... una toca inocentemente a la otra...

Saltan chispas... Es nuevo, es emocionante...

Me estas diciendo que no existe ni la mas minima posibilidad de que pase algo?

Carol: Maybe.

Quizas.

Ross: OH MY GOD!! I didn’t really believe it until you just said it!!

Dios mio!, no lo crei hasta que me dijiste que si!

[Scene: Joshua’s parents’ apartment, Rachel and Joshua are entering.]

Joshua: …and even though none of the other kids believed me, I swear to God, that duck pushed me!

Y aunque ninguno de los dos me creyo, te juro que el pato me empujo...

Rachel: Wow! This place is fabulous!

Esta casa es fantastica!

Joshua: Yeah, yeah, let me show you around. This is the uh, downstairs living room.

Dejame mostrarte. Este es el salon de abajo.

Rachel: Whoa-whoa, there’s two living rooms? God, growing up here, this place must’ve been a real babe magnet.

Tienen dos salones? Dios, esta casa debia ser un autentico iman para las chicas!

Joshua: Yeah, well, it would’ve been, but uh, my parents just moved here.

Bueno, lo hubiese sido, pero mis padres acaban de mudarse aqui.

Rachel: Ohh, you should know, this place is a real babe magnet. Wanna make out?

Ah, pues tengo que decirte que esta casa es un autentico iman para las chicas!

Tengo una idea: Por que no meto la comida en la nevera y cenamos luego?

(They kiss.)

Joshua: Hey, here’s an idea. Why don’t uh, I put the food in the fridge and we can eat it later?

Rachel: That sounds like a plan. Umm, is there a place I can go freshen up?

Me parece un buen plan.

Hay algun lugar donde pueda refrescarme.

Joshua: Oh yeah, yeah uh, it’s down the hall and uh, second door to your left.

Oh, si, si! Al final del pasillo y la segunda puerta a la izquierda.

Rachel: Ah.

(She goes down the hall. Joshua goes to put the food away when his parents walk in.)

Mrs. Burgin: Oh, hi, darling!

Hola querido.

Joshua: Mom, Dad, what are you guys doing here?

Que hacen aqui?!

Mrs. Burgin: Oh, well we cut the trip short.

Estabamos hartos de las vacaciones...

Mr. Burgin: France sucks!

Francia apesta.

Joshua: Umm, this may be a little weird, but I-I-I got a date here.

Puede que les resulte raro, pero estoy con una chica...

Mrs. Burgin: Oh, say no more!

No digas mas!.

Mr. Burgin: We’ll just grab some food and take it with us right upstairs, and we’ll be right out of you hair.

Tomaremos algo de comida, nos iremos arriba y no molestaremos.

Joshua: Oh, that-that would be great. So you didn’t even get to Italy?

Eso seria genial!... Ni siquiera han llegado hasta Italia?

Mr. Burgin: Yep, sucks!

Si apesta.

(They all go into the kitchen. Just then, Rachel comes back from the bathroom; she had removed her dress and is wearing nothing but a lace nightie. She tries to find someplace seductive to wait for Joshua. She tries to sit on the piano, but it makes too much noise. So she goes over to the couch and kinda half lays down to wait for Joshua. Joshua comes in from the kitchen, sees Rachel, and freezes.)

Rachel: Hi you!

Hola, cielo!.

Joshua: Oh my God!

Oh, Dios mio!.

Rachel: I know, I can do more than cook.

Lo se, se hacer otras cosas aparte de cocinar..

(Just then, his parents enter. Rachel gasps.)

Mr. Burgin: I like her. She sees smart.

Me gusta, parece inteligente.

Commercial Break

[Scene: Joshua’s parents’ apartment, continued from earlier.]

Joshua: Uhh, Rachel, my parents…

Rachel, mis padres.

Rachel: Ohh! It’s so nice to meet you. (She goes over and shakes their hands.) Hello.

Encantada de conocerles! Hola, mucho gusto!

Mr. Burgin: Hi.

Rachel: Hello.

Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.

Joshua, los quinientos dolares que te deje eran para comida...

Rachel: What? This-this, no, oh no, no-no-no, this is not—that’s-that’s not what it is. See, see, okay, I work in fashion, see and-and, this is a real dress actually. It’s-it’s, they’re-they’re wearing it in Milan, so part of my job is too wear the clothes, and then I see how people respond, and then I report back to my superiors at Bloomingdale’s, so… And obviously in uh, in-in this case, (She grabs a pen and paper) I am going to report back, "USA not ready."

Que?! Esto... no, no, no, no! Esto esto no es lo que parece!

Veran, es que yo trabajo en moda, y de hecho esto es un vestido, saben?

Esto es lo que se lleva en Milan este ano!

Parte de mi trabajo es ponerme la ropa y luego ver como reacciona la gente.

Despues les entrego un informe a mis superiores en Bloomingdales...

Obviamente, en este caso voy a tener que informarles de que "En America no estan preparados"...

Mrs. Burgin: Maybe in L.A?

Tal vez en Los Angeles...

Rachel: Yes!

Si.

Joshua: There you go.

Mr. Burgin: So, have you kids eaten yet?

Han cenado ya, chicos?

Rachel: Well, we were going to do that after—I mean umm, next.

Bueno, ibamos a cenar despues....

Quiero decir...... ahora.

Mr. Burgin: Well, we’re starving, why don’t we all go get something to eat?

Nosotros estamos hambrientos. Por que no salimos todos a cenar?.

Rachel: Oh, yeah, well… Yeah, no use wasting this baby, just lyin’ around the house.

Si.

Seria una tonteria desperdiciar este vestido para estar  en casa...

Mr. Burgin: So… We go eat.

Rachel: Yes.

Mr. Burgin: You’ll wear that. We’ll be eating, and of course, you’ll be wearing that.

Asi que vamos a cenar... Tu usaras eso... Nosotros cenaremos y tu usaras eso.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is looking for a new name in Phoebe’s book of names.]

Joey: Dude, I am sorry about what I said!

Amigo siento lo que te dije...

Chandler: No, no, you’re right, it is a ridiculous name!

No, no, tienes razon... es un nombre ridiculo.

Joey: It’s not that bad.

No es tan malo.

Chandler: Yes it is! From now on, I have no first name.

Si lo es.

De ahora en adelante no tengo nombre de pila.

Joey: So, you’re just Bing?

Te llamaras solo ....... Bing.

Chandler: I have no name.

No tengo ningun nombre.

Phoebe: All right, so, what are we supposed to call you?

Entonces como se sup

The One With The Free Porn

Story by Mark J. Kunerth
Teleplay by Richard Goodman
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching TV, and we hear Mr. Treeger in the bathroom.]

Mr. Treeger: Ohhh, man!!

Que asco!.

Joey: (coming in from his bedroom) What is that?

Que es eso?

Chandler: Treeger’s snaking the shower drain.

Treeger esta destapando el desague de la banera.

Mr. Treeger: What in the name of hell?

Que diablos es esto?

Joey: Maybe he found you flip-flop.

A lo mejor encontro tu chancleta.

(Joey sits down and changes the channel, and we see two people making out.)

Chandler: Hey!

Joey: Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I must’ve hit something on the remote.

Es pornografia?.

Que hice? Debo haber apretado algo del control remoto.

Chandler: Do we pay for this?

Pagamos por esto?

Joey: No, we didn’t even pay our cable bill?maybe this is how they punish us.

No, ni si quiera hemos pagado la cuenta del cable.

Chandler: Maybe we shouldn’t pay our phone bill?free phone sex.

Quizas esa sea la forma como nos castigan.

Entonces no paguemos el telefono, asi nos daran sexo telefonico gratis.

Joey: Maybe we shouldn’t pay our gas bill? (Stops and thinks about what he just said.)

Tampoco deberiamos pagar el gas!

Mr. Treeger: (coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that lady’s all kinds of naked.

Esa mujer esta totalmente desnuda.

Chandler: Yeah, Joey just pressed something on the remote and it just, came on!

Si, Joey apreto un boton del control remoto y simplemente aparecio!

Mr. Treeger: Yeah, it happened to me once. I was just flipping through the channels and bam! It was like finding money.

A mi tambien me paso una vez.

Estaba haciendo zapping y bam! Fue como encontrar dinero.

Chandler: Like finding money with naked people on it!

Es como encontrar dinero con gente desnuda!

Mr. Treeger: Then I made the mistake of turning off the TV, I never got it back again. And I’m sad. (Exits.)

Pero luego cometi el error de apagar el televisor, jamas volvi a sintonizarlo.

Y estoy triste.

Joey: (to Chandler) Why would he turn off the TV? (Chandler shrugs.)

Por que apagaria el televisor?

Opening Credits

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]

Rachel: All right, y’know what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)

Chicos, de verdad tenemos que ver eso mientras comemos.

Joey and Chandler: (stopping her) Oh no-no-no-no!

No, no ,no!.

Chandler: We don’t know what could make this go away.

No sabemos que podria hacerlo desaparecer.

Joey: Yeah, so no one touches the remote. And no one touches the TV!

Si, asi que nadie toca el control remoto. Ni nadie toca el televisor!

Chandler: And no one touches the air around the TV!

Y nadie toca el aire que hay alrededor del televisor.

Joey: Imagine a protective porn bubble if you will, okay?

Imaginen una burbuja protectora del porno, si pueden.

Monica: Well at least, I’m going to mute it.

Por lo menos dejame quitarle el sonido.

Joey and Chandler: Oh no-no-no! (Monica mutes the TV and they tentatively look behind them)

Oh no, no. no!

Chandler: We still have porn.

Todavia tenemos porno.

Joey: Hey.

Phoebe: (entering, carrying her massage table) Hi!

Monica: Hi!

Rachel: Honey, what are you doing? That’s too heavy.

Que estas haciendo? Eso es muy pesado.

Phoebe: Yeah.

Rachel: Give it here. (She takes the table.) Oh, God. (And gives it to Monica right away.)

Oh Dios!

Monica: Okay.

Phoebe: Ohh, I’m getting too pregnant for this, lugging around a stupid massage table. Y’know, I have to find a job where I carrying a smaller table. (She goes over and stands in front of the TV.)

Estoy muy gorda para seguir cargando con esa porqueria de camilla para masajes.

Necesito un trabajo en el que pueda llevar una camilla mas pequena.

Chandler: Or a job where you don’t have to carry a table.

O uno que no requiera que lleves camilla.

Phoebe: You mean like a doctor?

Como de doctor.

Joey: Pheebs! You’re blocking the porn! Look out!

Phoebe! Estas tapando el porno! Apartate!

Phoebe: Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.

Eso me recuerda que hoy tengohora con mi ginecologa.

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering.]

Ross: Hi.

Monica: Hi.

Ross: So uh, Emily just went to the airport.

Emily acaba de salir para el aeropuerto.

Monica: Oh. Why didn’t you take her?

Por que no la acompanaste?

Ross: Eh, her-her uncle already had planned on doing it. And y’know, we-we said our good-byes this morning, so…

Su tio ya se habia ofrecido para llevarla.

Y, bueno, ya nos despedimos esta manana, pues...

Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!

Debes de sentirte fatal. Los chicos tienen porno gratis!

Ross: (Thinks about it.) Nah.

No, no me interesa.

Monica: Hey, cheer up! You’re gonna see her again, right?

Animate! Volveras a verla, verdad?

Ross: Well I, that’s the thing, I don’t know! I mean, whenever I brought it up with her she said, (In a British accent.) "This is so fantastic! Why do we have to talk about the future? Let’s just enjoy…"

Ese es el problema, no lo se!

Cada vez que sacaba el tema me decia...

"Estamos viviendo algo fantastico! Por que tenemos que hablar del futuro? Disfrutemos de..."

Monica: (interrupting him) No-no-no, don’t-don’t do the accent. You’ve got to see her again.

No, no imites el acento.

Tienes que volver a verla.

Ross: And why do you care so much?

Y a ti por que te importa tanto?

Monica: Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!

Porque! Podrias llegar a vivir mi fantasia!

Ross: You had fantasies about Emily?

Has tenido fantasias con Emily?

Monica: No! Y’know, the fantasy! Meet someone from a strange land, fall in madly love, and spend the rest of your lives together.

No! Me refiero a la fantasia!

Conocer a un extranjero, enamorarse locamente, y pasar juntos el resto de la vida.

Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?

Era por eso que en la secundaria, eras la unica que se relacionaba con aquel nino Ukrainiano?

Monica: Yeah that, plus his mom used to put sour cream on everything!

Si por eso.

Ademas porque su madre le ponia crema agria a todo.

Ross: Ahh.

Monica: Do you love her?

La amas?

Ross: We said it was only going to be two weeks, y’know?

Acordamos que solo duraria dos semanas, sabes?

Monica: You love her!

La amas!.

Ross: What-what is love really?

Pero que es el amor en realidad?

Monica: Ohhh, I knew you loved her! Then you need to go to the airport and tell her. You’re probably just gonna catch her just as she’s about to go to the gate. You’re gonna call out her name and say, "I love you!" And she’s gonna say, "I love you, too!" And you guys are going to have the most amazing kiss, everyone at the gate will applaud.

Sabia que la amabas!.

Tienes que ir al aeropuerto y decirselo.

Seguramente la alcanzaras en la misma puerta de embarque.

Gritaras su nombre, y le diras: "Te quiero!" y ella te dira: "Yo tambien te quiero!".

Entonces le daras uno de esos besos de pelicula y la gente les aplaudira.

Ross: I am a good kisser.

Yo soy un buen besador.

Monica: Then you two can, can sneak into the cockpit, and things will start to heat up, and then a stewardess comes in… (Ross looks at her.) I’ve been watching too much porn.

Entonces entraran en la cabina del piloto.....

Se empezaran a exitar.... y entrara una azafata...

He visto demasiado porno.

[Scene: Beth Israel Medical Center, Phoebe is at her OB-GYN doing an ultrasound, Rachel is with her. We here the baby’s heartbeat.]

Rachel: Is that the heartbeat?

Eso es el corazon?

The Doctor: That’s it.

Asi es.

Phoebe: Oh my God!

Oh Dios mio!

Rachel: Oh wow! This is so cool.

Esto es maravilloso.

(The heartbeat changes, and we hear a different one.)

The Doctor: Have we talked about the possibility of multiple births?

Habiamos hablado de la posibilidad de un parto multiple?

Phoebe: Why don’t take care of this one, and should I get pregnant again, I’ll hold onto your card, okay?

Por que no acabamos primero con este, y guardare su tarjeta por si vuelvo a quedar embarazada.

The Doctor: No, I’m getting three separate heartbeats.

No, estoy captando tres latidos diferentes.

Phoebe: Three? You guys were worried I wouldn’t even have one!

Tres? Me dijeron que a penas se oiria uno!

The Doctor: Doctors are wrong all the time.

Los medicos se equivocan constantemente.

Phoebe: Well, yeah.

Rachel: Well, so, are-are you sure that there are three?!

Pero, oiga, esta segura de que hay tres?!

The Doctor: Definitely. (Points out each head on the ultrasound.)

Definitivamente.

Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months I’m going to have three full grown babies just walkin’ around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And it’s gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!

Oh Dios mio! Oh Dios mio! Dios mio!.

Me esta diciendo que dentro de unos meses tendre tres bebes alborotando dentro de mi?!

Sera como en ese juego de los troncos en la que todos salen disparados!

The Doctor: Actually, giving birth to three babies isn’t that different from giving birth to one.

En realidad dar a luz a tres bebes no es tan diferente de dar a luz a uno.

Phoebe: What do you know?!

Que sabe usted?

[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there, waiting to tell Frank and Alice the news.]

Alice: (entering) Oh-oh, Phoebe!

Phoebe! Hola.

Phoebe: Ooh! Hi!

Alice: Hi! (She runs over and hugs Phoebe’s stomach.) So, how did it go at the doctors?

Como te fue con la doctora?

Phoebe: Oh well, okay, hey, y’know how when you’re umm, you’re walking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh, that’s nice?"

Han visto cuando vas paseando por la calle y ves a tres personas, en fila, y piensas, "Que bonito?"

Frank: Yes.

Si.

Phoebe: Okay, yeah well, good news, you’re going to have three babies.

Si, buenas noticias, van a tener tres hijos.

Alice: Three babies?

Tres bebes?

Frank: I finally got my band!

Por fin voy a tener mi banda de musica!.

Alice: We’re gonna have a big family, I’ve always wanted a big family!

Vamos a ser una familia numerosa. Siempre he querido familia numerosa!

Phoebe: Oh God, I’m so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you were going to be all freaked.

Dios mio, me alegro de que esten tan contentos, tenia miedo de que no les gustara la noticia.

Frank: Why would we be freaked?

Por que no nos iba a gustar?

Phoebe: No, no maybe ‘cause it’s harder to raise them, and the added expense, and…

Bueno, por todo eso de la educacion y los gastos adicionales....

Frank: (They’re less than happy now) Oh.

Alice: Right.

Cierto.

Phoebe: No, back to happy. Back to happy!

No, sigan contentos. Sigan contentos!

Alice: No-no-no, no, it’s going to be fine. Because umm, because I teach Home Ec, and uh, I can have 30 kids making baby clothes all year long. Y’know it’ll-it’ll be like my very own little sweatshop.

No, no, no estaremos bien. Porque....

Porque soy profesora de ciencias del hogar....

Y podre tener a 30 chicos que hagan ropa de bebe durante todo el ano.

En fin, sera como tener mi propia fabrica con obreros explotados.

Frank: Yeah, I’ve been thinking ever since you said we were having triplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.

Estuve pensando desde que dijiste que vamos a tener trillizos,....

Y lo que podria hacer seria dejar la universidad y buscar un trabajo.

Alice: No, Frank.

No Frank.

Phoebe: No you can’t quit college! No! You’re in college? Really?

No, no puedes dejar la universidad! No!

Vas a la universidad? Cierto?

Frank: Yeah, refrigerator college.

Si a la universidad del refrigerador.

Alice: Yeah.

Frank: Yeah, y’know when we found out we were going to have a baby, y’know I figured y’know like I should y’know have like a career?and I love refrigerators!

Cuando supimos que ibamos a tener un hijo empece, a pensar que deberia tener alguna carrera, sabes?.

Y me encantan los refrigeradores!.

Phoebe: You can’t give up on your dream.

No puedes abandonar tu gran sueno.

Frank: No, it’s okay. We’re-we’re gonna have three kids! And that’s-that’s a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.

No esta bien.

Vamos a tener tres hijos! Y ese, ese es otro tipo de sueno.

Tres hijos y nada de dinero!.

[Scene: The airport, Emily is getting ready to board her flight to London.]

Ticket Agent: (On the P.A.) This is the boarding call for Flight 009.

Ultimo aviso para el vuelo 009.

Ross: Emily! (Runs up.)

Emily!

Emily: Oh my God! What are you doing here? (They hug)

Que estas haciendo aqui?

Ross: I just, I had to see you one more time before you took-off.

Tenia que verte una vez mas. Antes de que te fueras.

Emily: You are so sweet. (They kiss.)

Eres muy tierno!.

Ross: That’s, that’s, that’s a big candy bar. (She’s holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.

Esa es una gran barra de chocolate.

He pasado unos dias increibles contigo.

Emily: Me too.

Yo tambien.

Ticket Agent: This is the final boarding call for Flight 009.

Ultimo aviso para el vuelo 009.

Emily: Well, that’ me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) I’m only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)

Ese es mio.

Ross: (stops her) Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm, I’ve been thinking, I’m just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-I think I love you.

Toma esto.

Ademas solo se puede subir un bolso en el avion. Espera ...

Tengo que decirte algo....

Escucha, he estado pensando..... voy a decirlo sin rodeos.

Creo... Que te amo.

Emily: Oh. (She’s shocked and hugs him.) Thank you. (She boards the plane.)

Gracias.

Ross: That’s no problem.

No hay problema.

Commercial Break

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Rachel is singing some kind of song.]

Rachel: What’s that song? It has been in my head all day long.

Que cancion es esa? Llevo todo el dia tarareandola.

Chandler: It’s the theme from Good Will Humping.

La de la Insaciable Willma Humping.

Rachel: Y’know who doesn’t even like dirty movies? My new boyfriend Joshua.

Saben a quien no le gustan las peliculas pornos?

A mi nuevo novio Joshua.

Joey: Yeah right.

Si, claro.

Rachel: No, he told me. He prefers to leave certain things to the imagination.

No, me lo dijo el. Prefiere dejar ciertas cosas para la imaginacion.

Chandler: Oh-oh, yeah, and did he also say that ah, some of the dialogue was corny and that he actually found it was funny and not sexy?

Y te dijo tambien que creia que los dialogos eran muy tontos...

y que en realidad las encontraba mas graciosas que eroticas?

Rachel: Yes!

Si.

Joey: Yeah, he likes porn.

Si, le gusta el porno.

(Rachel starts to leave.)

Monica: Where ya going?

A donde vas?

Rachel: I’m going to find out if he really thinks supermodels are too skinny. (As she exits, Phoebe enters.) Hey, Pheebs!

A averiguar si cree que las modelos son demasiado delgadas.

Hola Phoebe.

Phoebe: Hey.

Joey: Hey!

Monica: How did it go with Frank and Alice?

Que tal te ha ido con Frank y Alice?

Phoebe: Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, ‘cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.

Bueno, Frank tiene que dejar la universidad porque su hermana superfertil va a tener tres bebes!

Necesito ganar dinero en poco tiempo, asi que se me ha ocurrido una idea que quiero comentarte...

Porque trabajas para una gran empresa, Ok?

Informacion privilegiada, que clase de informacion puedes facilitarme.

Chandler: They don’t really talk to us about that kind of stuff. I can get you some free white out though.

De hecho, nunca nos hablan de ese tipo de cosas, pero podria conseguirte cosas gratis.

(Ross enters.)

Monica: Ohh! Did you do what I said? Did-did-did you tell her?

Has seguido mi consejo? Se lo dijiste?

Ross: I did.

Lo hice?

Monica: And well, what did she say?

Y que dijo ella?

Ross: Thank you.

Gracias.

Monica: Oh, you’re totally welcome! What’d she say?

No me lo agradezcas! Que te dijo?

Ross: She said, "Thank you." I said, "I love you." And she said, "Thank you."

Ella dijo "Gracias". Yo le dije, "Te amo."

Y ella me contesto, "Gracias."

Chandler: Whoa-whoa, wait a minute, did you say, you love her?

Un momento, le dijiste que la amabas?

Joey: Yeah, what were you trying to get her to do?!

Si, que pretendias conseguir con eso?!

Ross: What do I do now?

Que debo hacer ahora?

Joey: You play hard to get.

Hacerte el desentendido.

Ross: She already lives in London.

Te recuerdo que vive en Londres.

Joey: Then you go to Tokyo.

Entonces vete a Tokyo.

Chandler: All right look, forget it, forget it. You told her you love her, it’s over.

Olvidala, Ok? Olvidala.

Le dijiste que la amabas se acabo!

Monica: It is not over! You’re over!

No se ha acabado!. Tu estas acabado!

Chandler: What?

Que?

Monica: You know!

Tu sabes? Ok.

Chandler: Okay. (Pause) Good one.

Esa fue buena.

Monica: It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she loves you. And the reason why she couldn’t, is because her feelings were so strong, it scared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from the plane! Come on now go! Go! (Tries to push Ross out the door.)

No se ha acabado porque ella te llamara para decirte que te quiere.

Y que no te lo ha dijo antes porque sus sentimientos eran tan fuertes que le daba miedo.

Asi que vete a casa y espera su llamada! Podria estar llamandote ahora! Vamos, vete! Vete!

Ross: Okay! Okay! But if she doesn’t call, it is definitely over! No, wait. Wait. Unless, eventually, I call her, y’know just to she what’s going on, and, and she says she’ll call me back, but then she doesn’t. Then it’s over.

Esta bien, esta bien, pero si no me llama hoy se acabo para siempre!

Espera, espera. A no ser que, algun dia la llame yo, solo para saber como esta......

Y, Y.... me diga que me volvera a llamar y no lo haga.

Entonces todo se habra acabado!.

(Joey holds his fist up, and Chandler gives him two thumbs up.)

Joey: Way to be strong, man!

Se fuerte amigo!.

(Ross leaves, and after the door closes, Joey gives him the loser sign.)

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Joey enter having just woken up.]

Rachel: Hey!

Chandler: Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a porn break. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.

Podemos ver dibujos animados en su televisor?

Necesitamos un descanso del porno.

Llevamos dos horas viendo In & Out y dentro otra vez.

Rachel: Well, so, why don’t you just turn it off?

Pero, por que sencillamente no lo apagan?

Chandler: Because then we would be the guys who turned off free porn.

Porque no podemos renunciar a ver porno gratis.

Phoebe: (entering carrying a case) Ooh, good, you’re hear! Okay.

Que bueno que esten aqui!.

Monica: Hey!

Phoebe: Hi!

Rachel: Well, what-what ‘cha got there?

Que traes ahi?

Phoebe: Oh this, well I’m glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and an soda can.) Now, don’t you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what you’re thinking…

Oh esto? Me alegro de que me lo preguntes.

Bien, verdad que es odioso tener que cortar una lata con un cuchillo normal de carne?

Se lo que estan pensando?

Chandler: Pregnant Woman Slays Four?

Mujer embarazada, mata a cutro personas.

Monica: Phoebe, they didn’t make you pay for those knives, did they?

No te habran hecho pagar por esos cuchillos, verdad?

Phoebe: No!

No.

Monica: Are you sure?

Estas segura?.

Phoebe: No!

No.

Rachel: Honey, you’re not gonna make enough money to help Frank and Alice just by selling knives.

No podras ganar suficiente dinero para ayudar a Frank y Alice vendiendo cuchillos.

Phoebe: No-no, I know that, but I just have to make enough money for the second part of my plan.

No-no, eso ya lo se, pero solo necesito el dinero suficiente para la segunda parte de mi plan.

Chandler: What’s the second part of your plan?

Cual es la segunda parte?

Phoebe: My Saturn dealership.

Mi concesionario en Saturno.

[Scene: Ross’s bedroom, he has fallen asleep waiting for Emily to call. He is awaken by the phone.]

Ross: (Answers the phone.) Hello?

Hola?.

Emily: Ross.

Ross?

Ross: Emily, hi! Uh, how-how was you flight?

Emily, hola! Como estuvo tu vuelo?

Emily: It was dreadful. I felt terrible about how I acted when you said those wonderful things.

Espantoso.

Me sentia horrible por como reaccione cuando me dijiste esas cosas tan maravillosas.

Ross: No, no, that-that, that’s all right. Umm, I’m just glad you called.

No, no, tranquila, no pasa nada. Me alegro de que hayas llamado.

Emily: Ross umm, there’s something that I’ve got to tell you, there’s-there’s someone else.

Ross.... Hay algo que tengo que decirte.....

Hay otra persona.

Ross: Does that mean the same thing in England as it does in America?

Eso significa lo mismo en Inglaterra que en America?

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is relating his recent conversation with Emily to the gang.]

Ross: She doesn’t know which one of us she wants, me or this Colin guy.

Ella no sabe a cual de los dos quiere, a mi, o a ese, ese tal Colin.

Monica: This isn’t how it’s supposed to go, there can’t be another guy.

Todo esto no tiene ninguna logica, no puede haber otro hombre.

Ross: Well…

Monica: Of course there’s another guy!! This is even more perfect! Now you have to prove your love!

Claro que hay otro hombre!! Oh! Eso si que es estupendo!

Ahora tienes que demostrarle tu amor!

Ross: I’m not proving anything. Okay, I’m done listening to you. If I hadn’t let you talk me into going to the airport in the first place, I never would’ve put my fist through the wall!

No voy a demostrarle nada.

No te voy a hacerte caso.

Si no hubiese dejado que me convencieras de que fuera al aeropuerto....

No hubiese atravesado la pared con el puno!

Chandler: You put your fist through

The One With The Fake Party

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teleplay by Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri

Story by Alicia Sky Varinaitis

Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]

Monica: What is it hon?

Qu te pasa?

Phoebe: I-I can't find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makes me nauseous! I'm telling you, being pregnant is no piece of cakeooh! Cake! (Chandler shrugs, and Phoebe grimaces.) No.

Nada, es que no me apetece comer nada!

Todo me da nuseas!

Esto de estar embarazada no es pan comido...... ooh! Pan!

No.

Monica: Aww, honey I'm sorry.

Cario lo siento.

Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? It's coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)

Qu es ese olor?

Viene desde el bao.

Chandler: Wow! Pregnancy does give you some weird cravings.

El embarazo provoca unos antojos muy raros.

[Cut to the bathroom, Joey is taking a shower and Phoebe knocks on the door.]

Joey: Yeah?

Si?

Phoebe: It's me. It's Phoebe. Listen there's something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?

Soy Phoebe.

Aqu hay algo que me da ganas de comer,  qu, qu, qu......

Huele tan bien?

(Joey sticks his head out of the shower curtain.)

Joey: Is it the shampoo? It's guava.

Es mi champu?

Es de guayaba.

Phoebe: (she smells his head) No!

No.

Joey: Oh! Wait-wait! (Reaches inside the shower.) Is it my bologna sandwich?

Oh! Espera, espera!

Es mi sndwich de mortadela?

Phoebe: Yes. Yes. Yes. I can't believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe he wants me to eat meat? I can't eat meat!

Si, si, si, si.

Es increble! El beb quiere mortadela!  Quiere que yo coma carne!?

Yo no puedo comer carne!

Joey: Oh, wait-wait! (Reaches into the shower again.) Maybe it's a pickle?!

Espera, espera!.

Tal vez sea el pepinillo?!

 (Phoebe grimaces at the smell.)

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are there. Rachel is writing something on a pad, and then crumples it up and throws it on the floor.]

Chandler: What are you writing?

Que escribes?

Rachel: Well, Joshua's coming in tomorrow and since I don't have the guts to ask him out, I'm going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.

Joshua va a venir maana y como no tengo hagallas para pedirle una cita.....

Voy a venderle un abrigo y le meter esta nota en el bolsillo.

Chandler: Oh yeah? (He grabs the pad and starts reading it.) Joshua, give me a call sometime, guys like you (Pause) never go out of stylewhat did you throw away?

Ah si?

Joshua, llmame un da de estos, los tipos como t nunca pasan de moda...

Por que votaste las notas anteriores.

(Ross and Emily enter.)

Chandler: Hi guys!

Hola chicos.

All: Hey!

Hola.

Joey: Hey, what have you guys been up too?

Que estan haciendo?

Ross: Oh, we went to see a collection of Victorian doorknobs and the Cupert-Hewitt museum.

Fuimos a ver una coleccin de pomos victorianos en el museo Cupert-Hewitt.

Chandler: Without me?!

Fueron sin mi?

Emily: My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be really interesting.

Mi to nos llevo hasta alla.  Pero, resulto ser muy interesante.

Ross: Yeah.

Emily: They were so ornate and beautiful, I mean look at that! (Shows them a doorknob she has.)

Eran muy bonitos y decorativos, en fin, miren!

Monica: I don't know how museums work in England but, here, you're not supposed to take stuff.

No se como son los museos en Inglaterra pero,  aqui, no puedes llevarte las cosas.

Emily: I uh, I got it from the gift shop. They have really lax security there. (Chandler is shocked.) It's a joke. (They all laugh.)

Lo robe en la tienda de regalos. All hay muy poca vigilancia.

Ross: Bye. (They kiss.)

Es broma.

Emily: Right, I've got to be off, I'll see ya. Buh-bye then. (She leaves.)

Bueno, tengo que irme.  Nos vemos, adis.

Adios.

Joey: Wow! You guys seem to be having a good time.

Parece que lo pasan muy bien.

Ross: Oh yeah, she's-she's amazing. And-and she's so much fun. And! Y'know what? When I'm with her, I'm fun! I even signed up for helicopter classes. (Chandler is shocked.) She's leaving in two days, I don't have to do it.

Si, ella es increble.  Y y es divertida. Y! Adems, saben qu?

Cuando estoy con ella, yo soy divertido!

Incluso me inscribi en unas clases de helicptero.

Se va dentro de dos das, no hace falta que lo haga.

Monica: Oh no, two days, you must be bummed.

Vaya, dos das, deberas estar triste.

Ross: Yeah, she's got to go back to London. But you know what? I've been prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together, and that's it. Y'know.

Si.

Tiene que volver a Londres.

Pero, sabes? Yo estaba preparado para esto desde el principio.

Sabamos que tenamos dos semanas para estar juntos, y que luego se acabara.

Joey: Hey that's what all my relationships are like.

Eso es lo que duran mis relaciones.

Chandler: Yes, but in Ross's case, they both know in two weeks that's it.

Si, pero en el caso de Ross, los dos saban que eran dos semanas y punto.

(Phoebe enters.)

Ross: Pheebs!

Phoebe Hola.

All: Hey!

Hola.

Ross: (starts rubbing her belly) Hello! Hello!

Hola, Hola.

Phoebe: (angered by the rubbing) Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, y'know? And I got nauseous.

Ya se , ya.

Al bebe se le ha antojado que coma carne.

Esta tarde intente engaarlo, y le prepare una hamburguesa de soya.....

Para que creyera que le estaba dando carne. Pero me dieron nuseas.

Chandler: Maybe that's because soy-burgers suck!

Eso es porque las hamburguesas de soya apestan.

Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.

No, el embarazo es muy duro para el estmago.

Joey: Hey, but at least you got that cool, pregnant lady glow.

Al menos tienes ese resplandor tan lindo de las embarazada.

Phoebe: That's sweat. You throw up all morning, you'll have that glow too.

No, eso es sudor. Psate la maana vomitando y t tambin lo tendrs.

[Scene: Bloomingdale's, Rachel is preparing to slip Joshua the note.]

Joshua: (coming in from a changing room) Okay!

Bueno!

Rachel: Oh, here's that trench-coat that you wanted.

Aqu tienes el abrigo que te gustaba.

Joshua: Oh great! (He tries on the coat.) Wow! Yeah, it's comfortable.

Oh si, es muy cmodo.

Rachel: Yeah?

Si?

Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)

Sera perfecto para hacer de exhibicionista.

Rachel: (stopping him) Oh no-no, no-no, they don't want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.

Oh no no, no no, no se pueden meter las manos en los bolsillos hasta que hayas salido.

Joshua: Why not?!

Por que no?!

Rachel: Well, that's because of a lot of ?(She imitates someone picking their nose and placing the treasure found in the pockets.)

Bueno, porque viene mucha gente que...

Joshua: Y'know, they ruin it for everybody.

Vaya, siempre pagan justos por pecadores.

Rachel: I know!

Lo se.

Joshua: Y'know, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.

Anoche me puse el jersey de cashimir para una cita.

Rachel: Oh?

Joshua: Yeah, it was my first date since the uh, since the divorce.

Si, la primera vez que sala desde el divorcio.

Rachel: Well, congratulations, so do you love her?

Vaya, felicidades ests enamorado de ella?

Joshua: No, no, no, she's nice but, y'know, it just it made me realize that I'm just not, I'm just not ready to be dating, y'know?

No, es simptica, pero me he dado cuenta de que no estoy preparado para salir con chicas, sabes?

Rachel: Huh. Well, uh, that's uh, that's interesting. (She goes over and retrieves her note.)

Bueno, eso es interesante.....

Joshua: (noticing her) Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?

Espera, espera que es eso?

Rachel: Oh, it's just an anti-theft device.

Oh, es un dispositivo antirrobo.

Joshua: Then uh, what's-what's this? (Shows her the real anti-theft device.)

Entonces, que es esto?

Rachel: You need that, you need that too 'cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. (Rips up the note.)

Es otro dispositivo porque obviamente un ladron podra romper este.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]

Rachel: Oops, sorry. Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! Actually, we have to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans.

Escuchen tenemos que tener una fiesta esta noche....

Empieza dentro de cinco minutos, as que cancelen todo.

Chandler: What are you talking about?

De que estas hablando?

Joey: Yeah, what' going on?

Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But it's actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said he's not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)

Tenemos que armar una fiesta de despedida para Emily.

Pero realmente es para Joshua.

Me dijo que no estaba preparado para salir con chicas,.....

Es que tuve que invitarlo a una fiesta para poder verlo fuera del trabajo.

Y ahora tengo la oprtunidad perfecta para seducirlo.

Ross: Well, as much as I'd like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and I aren't going to be here. All right? I mean, she's going to come by first to say good-bye, and then I've got a whole special evening planned. So I'm sorry, no party.

Bueno, por muchas ganas que tenga de conocera Josh y advertirlo.

Emily y yo no vamos a quedarnos aqu ok?

Pasar un momento para despedirse, y luego tenemos planeada una noche muy especial.

As que lo siento, no habr fiesta.

Joey: Awwww!

Emily: (entering) Hello?

Hola.

Rachel: Surprise!!!

Sorpresa!

Chandler and Joey: Surprise!!

Sorpresa!.

Emily: No one's ever thrown me a surprise party before!

Jamas me haban preparado una fiesta sorpresa!

Rachel: Well, it was all Ross's idea.

Bueno, todo ha sido idea de Ross.

Emily: You're so sweet! And I'm so surprised!

Eres muy dulce!

Me han sorprendido!

Ross: You really didn't know?

No sabas nada?

[Cut to later, the party is in full swing. Rachel is in the kitchen and Chandler goes over to talk to her.]

Chandler: Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there? (Points to the living room.)

Por que estas aqu si Joshua esta en la otra punta?

Rachel: Uhh, because I'm trying to play hard to get. Oh, quick he's looking over here, say something funny.

Porque intento hacerme la estrecha.

Oh, rapido, esta mirando haca aqui, di algo gracioso.

Chandler: Like what?

Como que?

(Rachel laughs hysterically.)

Joey: What-what-what is so funny?

Que que es eso tan gracioso?

Chandler: I said, "Like what?"

Dije, "como que".

Joey: Now that's a thinker.

Da para pensar.

Rachel: Okay, y'know what, y'know what? This playing hard to get thing is not working. Umm, hand-hand me those cherries. (Chandler does so.) Okay. Okay. (She does a little sexy walk over to where Joshua is standing.) Hi!

Esto de hacerme la estrecha no esta funcionando. Pasame las cerezas.

Joshua: Hi!

Rachel: Care for a cherry?

Una cereza?

Joshua: Oh, no thanks.

Oh, no gracias.

Rachel: No? Y'know, I can tie one of these into a knot using just my tongue.

No? Sabes, puedo hacer un nudo con esto utilizando solo la lengua.

(She tries to demonstrate this unique ability, but only succeeds in choking on it.)

Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)

Estas bien?

Ross: (interrupting Monica and Emily) So we should probably get going soon.

Creo que deberiamos empezar a pensar en irnos.

Emily: Oh, but the party's only just getting started!

Pero si la fiesta empezo hace muy poco.

Ross: Yeah, but we-we have to be at the Four Seasons for drinks in 15 minutes and then y'know, then The Plaza for dinner.

Si, pero nosotros tenemos que estar en el Four Seasons dentro de 15 minutos.....

Y luego, ya sabes, vamos a cenar al Plaza.

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