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The One With The Fake Party
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Teleplay by Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri
Story by Alicia Sky Varinaitis
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
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[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
Monica: What is it hon?
Qu te pasa?
Phoebe: I-I can't find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makes me nauseous! I'm telling you, being pregnant is no piece of cakeooh! Cake! (Chandler shrugs, and Phoebe grimaces.) No.
Nada, es que no me apetece comer nada!
Todo me da nuseas!
Esto de estar embarazada no es pan comido...... ooh! Pan!
No.
Monica: Aww, honey I'm sorry.
Cario lo siento.
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? It's coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)
Qu es ese olor?
Viene desde el bao.
Chandler: Wow! Pregnancy does give you some weird cravings.
El embarazo provoca unos antojos muy raros.
[Cut to the bathroom, Joey is taking a shower and Phoebe knocks on the door.]
Joey: Yeah?
Si?
Phoebe: It's me. It's Phoebe. Listen there's something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?
Soy Phoebe.
Aqu hay algo que me da ganas de comer, qu, qu, qu......
Huele tan bien?
(Joey sticks his head out of the shower curtain.)
Joey: Is it the shampoo? It's guava.
Es mi champu?
Es de guayaba.
Phoebe: (she smells his head) No!
No.
Joey: Oh! Wait-wait! (Reaches inside the shower.) Is it my bologna sandwich?
Oh! Espera, espera!
Es mi sndwich de mortadela?
Phoebe: Yes. Yes. Yes. I can't believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe he wants me to eat meat? I can't eat meat!
Si, si, si, si.
Es increble! El beb quiere mortadela! Quiere que yo coma carne!?
Yo no puedo comer carne!
Joey: Oh, wait-wait! (Reaches into the shower again.) Maybe it's a pickle?!
Espera, espera!.
Tal vez sea el pepinillo?!
(Phoebe grimaces at the smell.)
Opening Credits
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are there. Rachel is writing something on a pad, and then crumples it up and throws it on the floor.]
Chandler: What are you writing?
Que escribes?
Rachel: Well, Joshua's coming in tomorrow and since I don't have the guts to ask him out, I'm going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
Joshua va a venir maana y como no tengo hagallas para pedirle una cita.....
Voy a venderle un abrigo y le meter esta nota en el bolsillo.
Chandler: Oh yeah? (He grabs the pad and starts reading it.) Joshua, give me a call sometime, guys like you (Pause) never go out of stylewhat did you throw away?
Ah si?
Joshua, llmame un da de estos, los tipos como t nunca pasan de moda...
Por que votaste las notas anteriores.
(Ross and Emily enter.)
Chandler: Hi guys!
Hola chicos.
All: Hey!
Hola.
Joey: Hey, what have you guys been up too?
Que estan haciendo?
Ross: Oh, we went to see a collection of Victorian doorknobs and the Cupert-Hewitt museum.
Fuimos a ver una coleccin de pomos victorianos en el museo Cupert-Hewitt.
Chandler: Without me?!
Fueron sin mi?
Emily: My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be really interesting.
Mi to nos llevo hasta alla. Pero, resulto ser muy interesante.
Ross: Yeah.
Emily: They were so ornate and beautiful, I mean look at that! (Shows them a doorknob she has.)
Eran muy bonitos y decorativos, en fin, miren!
Monica: I don't know how museums work in England but, here, you're not supposed to take stuff.
No se como son los museos en Inglaterra pero, aqui, no puedes llevarte las cosas.
Emily: I uh, I got it from the gift shop. They have really lax security there. (Chandler is shocked.) It's a joke. (They all laugh.)
Lo robe en la tienda de regalos. All hay muy poca vigilancia.
Ross: Bye. (They kiss.)
Es broma.
Emily: Right, I've got to be off, I'll see ya. Buh-bye then. (She leaves.)
Bueno, tengo que irme. Nos vemos, adis.
Adios.
Joey: Wow! You guys seem to be having a good time.
Parece que lo pasan muy bien.
Ross: Oh yeah, she's-she's amazing. And-and she's so much fun. And! Y'know what? When I'm with her, I'm fun! I even signed up for helicopter classes. (Chandler is shocked.) She's leaving in two days, I don't have to do it.
Si, ella es increble. Y y es divertida. Y! Adems, saben qu?
Cuando estoy con ella, yo soy divertido!
Incluso me inscribi en unas clases de helicptero.
Se va dentro de dos das, no hace falta que lo haga.
Monica: Oh no, two days, you must be bummed.
Vaya, dos das, deberas estar triste.
Ross: Yeah, she's got to go back to London. But you know what? I've been prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together, and that's it. Y'know.
Si.
Tiene que volver a Londres.
Pero, sabes? Yo estaba preparado para esto desde el principio.
Sabamos que tenamos dos semanas para estar juntos, y que luego se acabara.
Joey: Hey that's what all my relationships are like.
Eso es lo que duran mis relaciones.
Chandler: Yes, but in Ross's case, they both know in two weeks that's it.
Si, pero en el caso de Ross, los dos saban que eran dos semanas y punto.
(Phoebe enters.)
Ross: Pheebs!
Phoebe Hola.
All: Hey!
Hola.
Ross: (starts rubbing her belly) Hello! Hello!
Hola, Hola.
Phoebe: (angered by the rubbing) Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, y'know? And I got nauseous.
Ya se , ya.
Al bebe se le ha antojado que coma carne.
Esta tarde intente engaarlo, y le prepare una hamburguesa de soya.....
Para que creyera que le estaba dando carne. Pero me dieron nuseas.
Chandler: Maybe that's because soy-burgers suck!
Eso es porque las hamburguesas de soya apestan.
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
No, el embarazo es muy duro para el estmago.
Joey: Hey, but at least you got that cool, pregnant lady glow.
Al menos tienes ese resplandor tan lindo de las embarazada.
Phoebe: That's sweat. You throw up all morning, you'll have that glow too.
No, eso es sudor. Psate la maana vomitando y t tambin lo tendrs.
[Scene: Bloomingdale's, Rachel is preparing to slip Joshua the note.]
Joshua: (coming in from a changing room) Okay!
Bueno!
Rachel: Oh, here's that trench-coat that you wanted.
Aqu tienes el abrigo que te gustaba.
Joshua: Oh great! (He tries on the coat.) Wow! Yeah, it's comfortable.
Oh si, es muy cmodo.
Rachel: Yeah?
Si?
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)
Sera perfecto para hacer de exhibicionista.
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh no-no, no-no, they don't want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
Oh no no, no no, no se pueden meter las manos en los bolsillos hasta que hayas salido.
Joshua: Why not?!
Por que no?!
Rachel: Well, that's because of a lot of ?(She imitates someone picking their nose and placing the treasure found in the pockets.)
Bueno, porque viene mucha gente que...
Joshua: Y'know, they ruin it for everybody.
Vaya, siempre pagan justos por pecadores.
Rachel: I know!
Lo se.
Joshua: Y'know, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.
Anoche me puse el jersey de cashimir para una cita.
Rachel: Oh?
Joshua: Yeah, it was my first date since the uh, since the divorce.
Si, la primera vez que sala desde el divorcio.
Rachel: Well, congratulations, so do you love her?
Vaya, felicidades ests enamorado de ella?
Joshua: No, no, no, she's nice but, y'know, it just it made me realize that I'm just not, I'm just not ready to be dating, y'know?
No, es simptica, pero me he dado cuenta de que no estoy preparado para salir con chicas, sabes?
Rachel: Huh. Well, uh, that's uh, that's interesting. (She goes over and retrieves her note.)
Bueno, eso es interesante.....
Joshua: (noticing her) Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?
Espera, espera que es eso?
Rachel: Oh, it's just an anti-theft device.
Oh, es un dispositivo antirrobo.
Joshua: Then uh, what's-what's this? (Shows her the real anti-theft device.)
Entonces, que es esto?
Rachel: You need that, you need that too 'cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. (Rips up the note.)
Es otro dispositivo porque obviamente un ladron podra romper este.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Oops, sorry. Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! Actually, we have to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans.
Escuchen tenemos que tener una fiesta esta noche....
Empieza dentro de cinco minutos, as que cancelen todo.
Chandler: What are you talking about?
De que estas hablando?
Joey: Yeah, what' going on?
Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But it's actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said he's not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)
Tenemos que armar una fiesta de despedida para Emily.
Pero realmente es para Joshua.
Me dijo que no estaba preparado para salir con chicas,.....
Es que tuve que invitarlo a una fiesta para poder verlo fuera del trabajo.
Y ahora tengo la oprtunidad perfecta para seducirlo.
Ross: Well, as much as I'd like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and I aren't going to be here. All right? I mean, she's going to come by first to say good-bye, and then I've got a whole special evening planned. So I'm sorry, no party.
Bueno, por muchas ganas que tenga de conocera Josh y advertirlo.
Emily y yo no vamos a quedarnos aqu ok?
Pasar un momento para despedirse, y luego tenemos planeada una noche muy especial.
As que lo siento, no habr fiesta.
Joey: Awwww!
Emily: (entering) Hello?
Hola.
Rachel: Surprise!!!
Sorpresa!
Chandler and Joey: Surprise!!
Sorpresa!.
Emily: No one's ever thrown me a surprise party before!
Jamas me haban preparado una fiesta sorpresa!
Rachel: Well, it was all Ross's idea.
Bueno, todo ha sido idea de Ross.
Emily: You're so sweet! And I'm so surprised!
Eres muy dulce!
Me han sorprendido!
Ross: You really didn't know?
No sabas nada?
[Cut to later, the party is in full swing. Rachel is in the kitchen and Chandler goes over to talk to her.]
Chandler: Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there? (Points to the living room.)
Por que estas aqu si Joshua esta en la otra punta?
Rachel: Uhh, because I'm trying to play hard to get. Oh, quick he's looking over here, say something funny.
Porque intento hacerme la estrecha.
Oh, rapido, esta mirando haca aqui, di algo gracioso.
Chandler: Like what?
Como que?
(Rachel laughs hysterically.)
Joey: What-what-what is so funny?
Que que es eso tan gracioso?
Chandler: I said, "Like what?"
Dije, "como que".
Joey: Now that's a thinker.
Da para pensar.
Rachel: Okay, y'know what, y'know what? This playing hard to get thing is not working. Umm, hand-hand me those cherries. (Chandler does so.) Okay. Okay. (She does a little sexy walk over to where Joshua is standing.) Hi!
Esto de hacerme la estrecha no esta funcionando. Pasame las cerezas.
Joshua: Hi!
Rachel: Care for a cherry?
Una cereza?
Joshua: Oh, no thanks.
Oh, no gracias.
Rachel: No? Y'know, I can tie one of these into a knot using just my tongue.
No? Sabes, puedo hacer un nudo con esto utilizando solo la lengua.
(She tries to demonstrate this unique ability, but only succeeds in choking on it.)
Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)
Estas bien?
Ross: (interrupting Monica and Emily) So we should probably get going soon.
Creo que deberiamos empezar a pensar en irnos.
Emily: Oh, but the party's only just getting started!
Pero si la fiesta empezo hace muy poco.
Ross: Yeah, but we-we have to be at the Four Seasons for drinks in 15 minutes and then y'know, then The Plaza for dinner.
Si, pero nosotros tenemos que estar en el Four Seasons dentro de 15 minutos.....
Y luego, ya sabes, vamos a cenar al Plaza.
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